Wednesday, April 11, 2007


I have never once in my life tried to misrepresent myself as anything other than a complete SNOB when it comes to recreation. Yes, it's true: I hate bars. I remarked to my hubby this weekend, when I had the displeasure of sitting in a smoky, smelly, LOUD bar, that all the folks in attendance were in desperate need of a HOBBY-- 'cause I could think of about 85 oher things that I would rather have been doing than just sitting there. At one point, I was even digging through my purse so I could re-organize my date book, but it was missing-- argh!

I mean, really-- what can you do? Smoke, purchase incredibly overpriced BEER (I can't imagine their wine list was very extensive), and shout yourself hoarse to try and converse (poorly) with your companions? Egads! How dull... You can't talk with your friends, you can't catch a quality buzz on piss beer, and the regulars aren't interesting enough to make for worthwhile people watching. (You've seen one drunkard trapped in the 1980's, you've seen them all--in fact, I think the guy playing pool was the same guy playing pool the last time I went into a bar, back in 1991. They're all the same guy, anywhere you go.)

I have often wondered why people go to bars: is it a class issue? Because the folks I see in bars look like they fall into somewhat of a lower income bracket. But I'll tell you, bars ain't cheap. Our (gross) beer was $11 a pitcher, and what is a pack of ciggies nowadays? Like $4? A game of darts was a few bucks per game, and the door was charging a cover for admittance.... so why couldn't you instead save your pennies and go to a gallery opening (free), eat (free) hors d'oeuvres, chat with interesting people (and actually hear them, and respond appropriately), bone up on local culture, and be able to breathe through your nose the next morning? Why, indeed.

Friends, all I can say is: LIFE IS SHORT. If it isn't beautiful, or stimulating, thought provoking, educational, or life affirming-- count me out. I got places to go... and a really nice Chilean wine to sample.

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