Dumb Head

Dodododododododododo....
I am waaaaaay too easily entertained! Between the "dododo's" and the weird organ thang that's going on, I could listen to this song over and over with a giant smile on my face, tee hee.
"Dumb Head", bwahaaahahahaaa!

Dumb_Head___The_Sharades.mp3

I have sooooo been enjoying the brief stint I've had pretending my children are at some Swiss boarding school for the summer (instead of Grandma's for the past 2 days...), and am trying to squeeze as much enjoyment of my alone time as I can until they return in an hour or so (and so what am I doing with my precious and rare chunk of ME time? Blogging... der).

In the meantime, here are some very cute pics of Ms Maggie pants, who isn't nearly as cute in person once you factor in the puppy spazticity (she opened the back room door last night with her schnozzle, a new trick, and let in about 80 gagillion mosquitoes-- I spent the better part of 30 minutes squashing them and pretty much freaking out at the sight of them, knowing they'd be keeping me up all night... that, and she ate a brand spankin new eyeshadow I splurged on- dangit! How does a dog eat eyeshadow? And why?)awwwww..... cute little demon puppy:-)

Still no ideas for the vacation we're taking next week. I figured we could load up the bikes and take a new bike trail each day and check out the cool stuff each town has to offer (Monday, Madison bike trail; Tuesday, Racine; Wed, drop Grace off for 5 days at Lifest and go camping at Point State Beach for more bike riding; Friday, Milwaukee). I've gotten no raves from the children (except Grace, who is only eagerly anticipating the 5 days of non stop concerts and general mayhem until 2 am-- better her than me, is all I gots to say about it...)

I figure that since we're not spending any big $$ on hotel rooms or kennel costs, we can really splurge on museum entry, trying different restaurants, renting kayaks, taking a boat tour, etc and etc, but *meh*-- nobody is all that interested but me.

On a side note, I discovered there's a great vegetarian restaurant in Brookfield I'd like to check out: Cafe Manna and Dandelion in Madison-- personally, I could spend the whole week biking to great restaurants and pigging out, but that's just me:-)

And HEY! I paid off my car loan to-day, tra la la!

Nothing is more lame than owing someone $$, so my life is a little less lame than it was yesterday, a vast improvement in my eyes.

And not only that, but it's a shortie week and we're closer to the weekend than usual:

wheeeeeeeee!

Arhg!

First the rains came, then the lands became inundated with flocks and evil swarms of bloodthirsty zombie spawn-- so freaking many that I've taken to dressing in head to toe coverings, like a FLDS-slash-headscarf wearing muslim in my attempts to keep them from biting me, some 100+ at a time.
When I was picking strawberries this afternoon, I could run my hand along my headscarf and crush whole hand fulls of them at a time, while dozens dive bombed for my eyeballs. Ewwwwwwww!
It's not bad enough that the strawberries, instead of the golf ball sized ones I had last year, are now quarter sized and smaller due to the flooding-- but I'm being eaten alive and left itching in my attempts to get them off the plants and into the freezer. Boo.
So far, I have 2 large ziploc bags, with probably a couple more to go before they're done. And while they're sad little strawberries, only a shadow of their former selves, they'll taste just fine in their next lives as strawberry margaritas and strawberry rhubarb pies... and I honestly should be grateful that the plants didn't just up and die having been under water for the better part of a couple weeks.
Sigh! I also got about 2 large bags of chopped rhubarb in the freezer, also not happy that it was temporarily an aquatic plant for a spell...

So I'm trying to plan a vacation for a chunk of time I've had reserved for over a month-- and I have absolutely NO idea what to do. None. Nada. Zilch. We're going to Chicago to see Cirque Du Soleil over the 4th of July weekend, but there's no holiday festivities going on (go figure...), and other than wandering around in Grant Park, Millennium Park, etc, I have no clue what to do in the Windy City. I'd like to check out Old Town/Greek Town, maybe China Town and a Japanese grocery (the kids love Japanese candy a la Woodmans), and maaaaaaaayybe take the kids to see Blue Man Group. But then after we return home, what to do for the remaining 5+ days?

I was thinking about going the tourist route and heading to the Wisconsin Dells-- we've never been there during the summer and might like the Mt Olympus theme park, Wisconsin Ducks, Wizard Quest, etc, and oogle the "waaaaaaay worse than dinky strawberries" outcome of the flooding in the area... do that for a couple days, hike at Devil's Lake/Parfrey's Glen for a few hours and then head back home to rescue the chickens. After that, we can do a day trip to Milwaukee (art museum, ride bikes by the lake, drool over the mansions of the rich and fabulous, take a class at Whole Foods, etc and etc), ride the Glacial Drumlin Trail and then wind up the week with a big nerd-a-lee trip to the Renaissance Faire, childhood workplace of old (and thus a nemesis-- I kindof reached my saturation point for that place years and years ago... but the kids like it).

I'm also trying to plan a trip to Peninsula State Park for the end of August-- love their bike trails, and both kids know how to sail so maybe we can rent a sailboat for the day, etc....
There's so little time available to take actual vacations, thus it's just so much easier to travel to familiar places vs head to parts unknown. That, and the kids aren't exactly gung ho travellers, making it hard to navigate uncharted waters with two boat anchors in tow, if ya know what I mean (one heavy object being a teenager who is horrified she can't get a signal to text her friends or find an outlet to plug in her straightener, and the other would rather be home playing on his computer) Sheesh! Kids these days...:-)

I'm hoping to head to the Craftacular that's happening this Saturday up in Madison, wheeeeeee! If anyone is up for a roadtrip, lemme know-- fun times and good food await us in Madison:

hey dere

Blogging from camp this week; I can't tell you how excited this makes me, compliments of my handy new iphone. Technology for me is like a warm, fuzzy blanket, one that makes me feel that the world is far more safe and orderly than it probably is, especially since I'm holed up and responsible for the health and well being of 100-some kids in the woods and all....
This is such a great time to relax and catch up on reading and other stuff I've put off, all those magazines I've let sit, some from early 2007.I'm eyeballing a book on beekeeping and one on Quebec, both I'd like to explore in the near future. I've tried to be more contemplative in my stretches of free moments, but invariably, if my thoughts aren't interrupted by the occasional head injury, my ADHD riddled brain changes channels before too many solid thoughts can form-- typical!
The latest quandary du jour is whether to send the boy child to a different school, a Montessori program that would hopefully lead him to his tribe of creative thinkers vs the typical rough and tumble kids he doesn't jibe with in his current school. He doesn't want to go, of course, but when your lil dude says it's cause the kids will hate him at the new school as much as the old one, makes you think the kid needs a change even more than you thought, n'est pas?
School sucks major ass, that's all I can say; from the hellacious days I was forced to endure my ownself to struggling daily alongside the kids-- the asscrap never ends.
Enough about that...
I'm still figuring out how to blog from the phone; Ill try and post photos of camp if it's possible.

Blue Girl Group?

I'm watching a documentary on PBS, and I've discovered a new occupational goal:
I want to work with Blue Man Group.
Because while I find working in the grown up world slightly fascinating (only because it doesn't make a whole lot o sense to me), my personality is still too much on the "mucho grande" side for many in the workplace (altho GI has been awesome! Some very cool ladies and docs there...).
I seem to have a limited shelf life for a lot of places; I've seen too much of the world, my perspectives are different, and my filters don't always work the way they should (probably moreso the last one than the rest, tee hee).

But anyhoo, I miss art. I miss interacting with the world in an interesting way... cause there's only so much fun I can whip up in these parts without being irreparably branded in the Burlington Circles (not that I wouldn't eventually find that entertaining, in retrospect).

If I wasn't so afraid of injury and my parts weren't already cranky, it would be way fun to start a Roller Derby team: I prefer to skate on ice, but the local roller rink is a nice substitute-- and how much fun would it be to kick some girlie ass after an exasperating day fighting the man AND evil girl children (not that the boy child isn't becoming a stinky teenie weiner his own self)?

And if I wasn't such a lazy, fearful slug I'd be well on my way to SOMETHING more than working and fruitless cleaning o the Casa K (a nod to: http://thekaetlancaresnot.blogspot.com/ I have a "Casa K" of my very own, so I'm not a big fat copycatter, I swear).

...Working, cleaning, and feeding the next generation of slugs-- that's quite a legacy there.
But I know if I wasn't always stuck in the "Go--See--Do" pattern that keeps me spinning in circles yet never really getting anywhere, I might actually be able to pinpoint a goal, a destination, something I'd like to accomplish before my attention wavers and I'm off to the next flight of ideas--- wheeeeeeeeeeeee!

What's another thing I'd like to do??

Oh yeah! I'd like to start having house concerts in the back part of the property; rent a port-a-wizmo ('cause I don't want strangers fingering my oddities in the domicile), build a little stage, and have folks over for a concert. There was a cool guy who was having some house concerts for a while, but I think his white carpets and overloaded potty eventuallybecame a deterrent for having strangers over. Nice guy... living his dream of doing something cool-- and a local guy, too.

When we were in Austin (story coming soon, I promise), we stumbled upon a fantastic little store in the barrio where I used to live in an Airstream trailer (best living space ever!).
When we checked it out, as I am a huge suck for vintage clothing and such, it turned out that the owner was having a little party in the back-- complete with bands and authentic Texas Bar-B-Que.
Within a few minutes, she knew our life history, we knew hers, and she was hooking us up with some Lone Stars, offering us some weed (totally legal in Austin, I swear...), and shoving us in the direction of the food-- all while sporting the most delightful southern drawwwlllllllllll.

Ah! Southern hospitality, only to be found in glorious Texas. But how fun is that, to have your yard full of people, having a good time (and with no Martha Stewart Maneuvers? That's my special little problem... "hardcore hostess syndrome", SO not a good thing). I'd move back to Austin in a heartbeat-- too bad it isn't going to happen anytime soon, boo.
To be continued...

Home Again:

Our trip to the Motherlands was very nice; the weather was beautiful and I tried to cram as much into our short afternoon as I could:

Burgers at the Spot ($20 for 4 burgers and 3 root beer whirls! ...and no-- they were NOT all for me-- I had 3 hungry adolescents and their raging hormones to feed. Boy howdy! It's expensive to eat junk...).

Surprise, surprise: turns out the kids didn't want to hang with me (snif!), and once I was able to contain my sadness, Maggie and I headed off to the lake for a walk.

She was AWFUL, btw:

She's a larger girl, so people don't think she's a still a puppy, and since she's a country dog, she's never seen so many people, animals, or citified (aka "not afraid") birds in her life... thus she was fairly HYSTERICAL the whole time trying to jump on, lunge at, and otherwise freak out every living creature who happened to be near us. Argh! Needless to say, my hands are raw from trying to hold her leash, and 1/2 of Kenosha thinks I'm a psycho "Dog Whisperer" wanna be, as I expected her to heel and not wander aimlessly on her leash as most pet owners allow their dogs to do.

Funny, tho-- there seem to be only two types of dogs who live in the city: little tiny pipsqueak/floofey dogs who pull on their leashes, dragging their (completely ridiculous looking) owners around, and scary looking pitbulls. Thank goodness, the pitbulls were far and above the best behaved; perhaps because their brains are larger than a co-co puff and no small children were in range for dining upon.

But where are the other kinds of dogs? The medium sized, Maggie sort-of *useful* pups (i.e. hunting dogs, etc)? Do you think there's an "ankle biters and children eaters only" ordinance on the city books?

Hmmmmmmm...maybe THAT'S why the nice city folks were looking at Maggie and I so strangely....yeah, that's probably it.

Other Kenosha highlights:

The kids and I drove around my favorite cemetery, and checked out the beautiful old tombstones and Dad's gravesite:

This one's my all time favorite:

We also made a visit to Isetts Park, playground of old:

Check out these AMAZING old pieces of playground equipment, upon which I learned at a wee age that metal is an excellent conductor of heat and gets booty blistering hot:

See the painful, sharp edges, perfect for slicing open your scalp? They just don't make 'em like they used to..

And the harsh laws of gravity, as in "when you suspend yourself from the monkey bars upside down and slip, you will not fly upwards like a fairy, but come crashing down on your silly head and see stars":

p.s. once upon a time, I remember my butt fitting into those *leeeetle tiiiiny* bebbe seats and screaming: UUUUUUUUUUNDERDAWG!!!

We also made a poorly advised trip to Woodman's, beloved Grocery Store of Bargains. They have the best organic produce/natural foods selection, and at super prices. Sad to say, tho, it was a fairly sucky trip for two reasons:

#1, the place was a mob scene; it was nearly impossible to get around without running someone over

and #2, grocery prices really HAVE gone up, boo! (somehow I thought this was some urban legend I would manage to escape; guess not)

The kids and I then picked up some food at "Pacific Wok", which was quite lovely. Their sushi was tasty, altho not nearly as bodacious as what we attempt to make at home (ours is always SUPERSIZED, prolly cause we don't really know how to make it civilized like you should), and the teriyaki steak was tasty. I would have liked more veggies, but I'm surely in the minority with that one... I would totally go again (but skip the "steamroller", that was yuckky times 1,000,000).

Ok... one more photo:

This sweet little girl had her rear leg AMPUTATED yesterday (the day before this photo was taken). Insane, truly. She's hopping around like nothing ever happened, trying to keep up with Maggie and just generally being the same happy go getter she was when she had all four appendages. Really, a huge testament to the indefatigable nature of dogs. Lovelovelove this girl!

Today...

I did a leeeeettle bit of something and a whooooole lot of nothing...

Since the MACRO portions of the gardens are complete, it was finally time to focus on the micro, as these are the last few details I need to complete before the weather gets hotter and I lose interest in all things garden-ey.

I planted a few sedums, sempervivium (hens and chicks), and creeping thyme in the chicken coop walkway (that was the little bit, as the plants are *teeny tiny*):

Lookin' gooooood

I also raked as much of the nepeta out of the much neglected front gardens as I could (they're the oldest and most well established, and always seem to be overlooked. Must be because there's a swamp up there, complete with scads of mosquitoes, which dims my enthusiasm a wee little bit...).

And so LORRY BE, HALLELUJAH-- stick a fork in me, I think I'm done!

The boys are sleeping in the tipi tonight, hope the skeeters don't drain em dry by morning:

And here's a little something, just for funs:

Ride 'em, CharlieCat! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee

p.s. all trips for the weekend are OFF, boo. But it looks like dd is trying to wrangle me into a trip to the motherland (Kenosha) to visit her friend. It sounds like she lives in the vicinity of the finest dining in K-Town, the Spot (!), where greazy cheezeburgers with extra pickles and grilled onions await us. The neighborhood around the Spot is fantastic, too, so between the historic downtown area with it's amazing architecture and the gigantic cemetary, I'm hoping we can get some walking in, and maybe with Ms Maggie, who could use a little city walking for a change. I hear that the Farmer's Market is up and running, so I might just get my market fix, after all:-)

Grandmere asked a few weeks ago, too, if I could take some photos of the tree planted in Isetts Park when my Grandfather died, so that'll be a nice segueway as well; I don't think Grace has been to her VERY OWN park before (we used to tell kids that it was our park when we were little-- what a bunch of snot faces we were!) I myself haven't been there in manymany years, I probably won't even recognize it.

And if we stay long enough, it would be nice to score a patio spot at Villa D Carlo's and do some quality people watching. We had a great time riding our motorcycles there about this time last year; probably one of the best family trips of the year, and by far the simplest:-)

Sooooooooo, if you see a wistful mom roaming the streets of Kenosha with an unruly puppy and three teenagers doing their best to look disaffected and bored, wave hello; as a country girl lost in the city, I'll try my very hardest not to look too wierded out-- I promise.

Madison?

OhhhhhKayyyyyyy... who wants to go to Madison with me tomorrow? I have a hankerin' not only to visit this super cool store I've been blog stalking for over a year:
http://glitterworkshop.com/dish/

but to stuff myself on fantastic foreign foods (Thai on Willy St, Nepalese on State St, that African joint by the capital, French food, rah rah rah!). I also like Frieda's on State, but their food is only so-so-- but any place that paints larger than life reproductions of Frieda Kahlo paintings on the walls is my kind of spot, I just won't delve much further than their extensive margarita and tequila menu... wheeeeeeeeee!

I'm feeling antsy and a need to wander; must be my sassy new haircut that the sweet young girl tried to talk me out of... even Ms. Gracy pant's friends were like, "what's up with your HAIR, Grace's mommy?".
Well, truth be told, girlies, Grace's mommy needs to get her groove on, so get used to it, 'cause she's about ready to jump out her very own skin with Spring Fever and is in search of some adventure, even if it is only of the shopping and eating kind (must be why I'm broke and FAT, according to my "Health Risk Assessment" I had to do at work yesterday. Broke I can deal with, but FAT?! Egads-- nothing I can't fix, tho, with the help of my friend Ann Louise Gittleman). Maybe if I took a lovely stroll or ride on the Madison bike trail after my snacking, I'd be less likely to be a pudgy liability to my employer, tee hee).
Anyhoodle.

If ya'll are up for a trip, let me know-- I'll drive and EVERYTHING... but with the Farmer's Market being open these days, mebbe Saturday would be better anyhow.
Either way-- fun people who can actually get together and do stuff, where are youuuuuuuuuuu?
This is sortof my new 'do; dark brown with bright red streaks. Fiesty!

Viva La Menstruacion!

Ok, just when you think the world is altogether too dull, you stumble upon something really entertaining:
www.vivalamenstruacion.com/
And I am sooooo bummed, 'cause the one I want is all sold out:-(

On a side note, I have been researching tattoo artists, not necessarily because I want one, just 'cause I apparenty have little else of substance to do since I haven't been able to sleep lately.

I've noticed that there is a distinct difference between the work that's done in Austin and what we have going on here in the Midwest. I'd say that down south the quality of art is much better, with much less dark lines and more complex use of colors. Here, most of what I've seen are traditional, old style stuff you'd expect to see on a sailor or a scary drunken biker/satan worshipper type.

Here's a wee sample of what I like:

http://www.southsidetattoos.com/Noska.htm
http://www.reztattoo.com/tina.html
http://tattooedladyhistory.vox.com/

This one is actually from the midwest; too bad I can't see it better:-)

Today We Planted:

Elliot, brigatta, spartan blueberries (early, midseason, and late berries; hope they pollinate ok~).
Bok Choi, napa cabbage, chiogga beets. Lavender (two varieties), tarragon, sage, transplanted a stella d oro daylily, more garlic, some runner beans to climb on the chicken coop, datura (two varities), eight arbor vitae, 2 black spruce, and 3 dogwoods.
On Saturday, we tilled the chicken coop pen/yard, and spent the day broadcasting mounds of rich compost all over the property, which was stinky but oddly satisfying...
And then we planted:
squashes, tomatoes, peppers, eggplant, chard (the rainbow variety) some stargazer lilies that were on clearance (my favorite), a couple specimen lilies for fun (arum corunatum and ismene hymenocallis), thyme, majoram, rosemary, and a few other things... I also finally got around to digging up the bee balm out of my coop garden and got it all planted out in the prairie where it belongs.

I'm sore, and sunburned, and couldn't be happier with how everything looks.
Spring! I hope it lasts and lasts...

Medusa's

I spent an all too brief part of my day on the streets of Chicago trying to revisit one of the best parts of my teenage years, and CRAP! I could squint and briefly put it all together, the sights, the sounds, perhaps the location-- and then...
it was gone.

I have dim recollections of the times I spent hanging out in Chicago, riding the El trains, drinking and peeing in alleyways with street people and teen prostitutes, wandering the streets of Boy's town and blowing my mind at Medusa's. Why, when I spent so many days, hours wandering a place, can't I remember it, picture it, figure out where it was?

Sadly, wonderfully, it was to be the most interesting and formative times I'd experience in my life (in retrospect); nothing has come close in my travels near and far. I've been to many *strange* places and circumstances since, but none have been remotely as fantastic.
Having used up my quota for cool at so early an age, I've spent the balance of my years as a bored cynic, doomed to wander the dregs of humdrum Summerfest crowds in dismay, looking for a glimmer of the beautiful strangeness I was so briefly a part of... bummer.
No photos exist, no one remembers it, I have no contact with old friends who took me there-- more chapters of my life that have no witnesses, more places from my past that have been erased from the face of the planet, without a trace.
Ah! Melancholy...
But here's a snippet I found, something to remind me of the 3rd floor video room where we'd take a break from dancing, drink an Orangina and smoke cigarettes, and make out with a guy (or two). I can still hear the echos of feet on the old wooden floors, the smell of the smoke from stinky clove and tobacco cigarettes, the deep vibration in your head and gut of the music coming at you from all angles, the excitement of being somewhere so odd:

Horrifically blasphemous, I know, fo shizzle why it took so long for me to give God and church a try...
p.s. I discovered that there is a WORLD out there this weekend... a world that finds me witty and funny and likes me as much as I like it back. I am both amazed and overwhelmed with the knowledge of such-- I wonder if it missed me?

Spring Gardens 2008 (and Mother's Day Gifts!)

Ahhhh, what the heck; now that I'm feeling like the clever girl who can imbed Flickr slideshows, I can't help but post one more, just 'cause I can (and cause it was such a hairy pain in the arse to figure it out, I now have a massive ache in my head):

Maple Syrup 2008

I FINALLY got around to posting the photos for our maple syrup making adventure (fiasco), a trial only to be compared with the one I faced trying to figure out how to post a Flickr slideshow (egads! and I could never tell you how I did it, I have no clue..)

Old Greg? WTF...

This is by far the weirdest thing I've seen in long time. I think I like the singing the best... "Mangina"? It's completely horrible and entertaining all at the same time, much like the "funky ball o tits from outer space".

Here's a deleted scene, just for funs:

Week From the Bowels of Satan:

All my recent bragging about my stress free life surely has angered the powers that be, and as such I have endured a fairly sucky week, the likes of which I hope to never revisit.
Last week it was cranky co workers, and this week it was a reillumination of the horrors of compulsory education, "Private School Edition", where I learned that even if you throw large sums of cash at a problem, it can still come 'round and bite you in the ass.
Try having a heated, serious phone discussion with the idiot on the other line that you will be consuming his balls for breakfast if he doesn't fix the problems his stupidity and laziness created-- *NOW*, while a doctor or two looks over your shoulder. Talk about stressful, especially since I've just recently gotten out of the soup at work.
And joy! The powerlessness that immersion in the middle class brings... makes you feel all warm and cozy inside that a whole class of people feel you and your offspring are disposable. But even the downtrodden can be well connected, as my friend discovered today. I may be a nobody (100% by choice) in our microscopic little town, but my people are dedicated somebodies somwhere else, even if most of them are gone and I spent a lifetime distancing myself from them.
But you never really know your worth until an organization (like the Catholic Church, par example) fixes it's gaze upon you and declares you inconsequential, and then demands payment for their trouble ($1000 to be exact). Ohwell. Let's just hope that I can get myself and dd out of this sans too much drama and controversy, and without hiring a lawyer and/or calling the papers. Man! It's just like being in high school *myself* again, which is about the very last thing I'd ever have wanted to do.

Kombucha!

I've been brewing my own Kombucha tea (KT) lately, after becoming infatuated with it a couple months ago.

There's something strangely appealing and repellant about it's urine like appearance, sour taste, and ooglie stuff on the bottom with the booger-y boojum on the top..... mmmmmmmmmm.

(just be sure you don't drink the booger thing, aka "scoby", by mistake. It's like coughing up something nasty and chunky and then swallowing it back down-- epecially if it gets stuck 1/2 way... **shudder**)

I got instructions from the 'net and made my own from a bottle of store bought KT, and was pretty darn surprised when it actually worked and didn't make me ill-- wahoo! (which is a clear indication that my standards are far too low when I get excited that I don't poison myself...)

I've been making it in 1/2 to 1 gallon batches ever since and always wound up a bottle or 2 short before the next batch was done, so when I saw a 2.5 gallon crock at Goodwill, I snatched it up. Score! Now I'll be able to do a continuous infusion, which I hear is how you make the best, most healthful brew. http://www.happyherbalist.com/continuous_brewing.htm

Since the scoby (="symbiotic culture of bacteria and yeast") thingamahoobie is a living organism and has been known to actually CLIMB OUT of the jar, I can't help but wonder if someday it will ooze it's way out in search of fleshier fare than green tea and sugar, and someone will find me one day in a gob of gooze:

Suckier things have happened...

Someone Please Kill Me Already:

In light of recent events, I have determined that everything fucking sucks royal ass.


Word.

Garden Update 2:

I'm sitting outside BLOGGING, heh heh-- WiFi is the single most useful thing in my house since lotion kleenex and satellite radio (...and parchment paper, can't forget that!). The mosquitos must have woken up today, damn nasty things, and I'm having to swat as I sit here watching the dog run like a wild child chasing the birds. She reminds me of a 7 year old who forgot to take her adderall; she has moments of attention span when she listens, but then loses focus the second a bird flies into her view-- even if it's in mid-leap, she's off an away to catch the elusive birds (even the ones who are almost too far up in the sky to see-- it's pretty darn funny). Maggie's apparently learned her boundaries, as she'll run the length of the yard at full speed in hot pursuit of a robin, and still stop a good foot or so before the boundary flags.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE the evil PETA-scorned shock fence. A dog quivering in fear of the nasty shocker thingamabobber is still better than a dead dog, as our entire family can attest to. Knowing your boundaries can keep you out of a heap o trouble, in the backyard as in real life (if only the kids were so easily trained...).
Interesting fact:
The chickens were afraid of Mr Six, wouldn't let him get near them. Today, Maggie took a flying leap to come nose to nose with a chicken, and the chicken didn't even flinch.
I guess the chickens are good barometers of danger... (maybe the robins clued them in).

Blooming:
anemones, violas, (yellow/bicolor daffs), muscari

p.s. BEST day at work today, the staff was so nice, helpful, and reaffirming:-) I couldn't be happier!
Too dark to type, I guess it's time to go in. Boo.

Garden Update/Macarons:

It was over 70 degrees this weekend, so the hubby and I felt motivated to ready the gardens over the past two days. We picked up sticks (we's got lots o sticks out here in the sticks-- 10 + loads full!), raked out and cleaned the perennial garden debris (5 loads full), tilled the kitchen gardens and the large garden patches.. I planted onions, garlic, shallots, beans, peas, spinach, and mesculin/spicy salad mix. I'm sore, sunburned, and feel 100% better, btw.
On a completely unrelated side note:
I made some macarons, and had very little difficulty (unless you count the dog eating a whole tray of them,.. damn!). The cookies turned out perfectly, and they were fabulous with a lightly almond/vanilla infused Italian buttercream (they were overstuffed since I had 1/3 less cookies to frost-- double stuffed macarons.....mmmmmmm). I'm going to try and make espresso macarons tonight, with a little bit of coconut flour in place of some of the almond (since I've conquered the mighty macaron, of course it's time to mess with the 200 year old recipe, wiseass that I am...) Husband says I need a new hobby vs making the most fussy recipes I can find, and I suspect he's right. I told him we needed a POOL, and that could be my new hobby vs the ass fattening one I currently have. I think he secretly wished my new hobby would include being a domestic goddess in other realms (cleaning the house daily, making gourmet dinners each and every night, martini and maribou slippers when he gets home from work each day...), but sorry dude, no such luck. I'll take a pool, and then the endless batches of cupcakes and French pastries will end. At least in the summer.

Espresso Macarons :
120 gr. egg whites, divided (this ends up being 4 egg whites total)
35 gr. sugar
150 gr. almond meal
150 gr. powdered sugar
2 tsp. espresso powder
For the syrup:150 gr. sugar and 50 gr. water

Prepare 3 sheet pans by lining them with parchment paper.Have a piping bag with a 1/2" round tip ready to go.
Sift together the almond meal, powdered sugar and espresso powder. Mix together with 60 grams of egg whites (2 egg whites) until well blended and set aside.
In a stand mixer, whip the remaining 60 grams of egg whites with the 35 grams of sugar to medium-soft peaks, turn the mixer to low speed to keep the whites moving while you prepare your sugar syrup.
-In a heavy bottomed sauce pan, bring the 150 grams of sugar and 50 grams of water to about 230f.
-Turn your mixer back up to medium speed and slowly pour in the hot syrup (carefully) not worrying about any that sticks to the sides of the bowl. Whip the egg white and syrup mixture until the whites are cooled and you have a very pretty shiny meringue.
-Gently fold the meringue into the almond mixture.-Pipe the mixture into 1" circles onto the prepared sheet pans leaving at least 1" of space between each.
Let the pans sit out for about half hour to an hour to allow a "skin" to form on top (basically when you touch your finger to the surface, no batter will come off).
-Preheat oven to 320f (I found 320f to be too hot for mine, they exploded at this temperature...but then my oven runs hot).
Bake the meringues, one sheet at a time (double sheet panned for insulation on the bottom) for about 15 minutes.
Remove from oven and allow to cool before filling.

Ganache filling:
6 1/2 ounces good quality semi-sweet or bittersweet chocolate, chopped into about 1/2 inch pieces
1/2 cup heavy cream
1 Tbsp corn syrup
1 Tbsp butter
-Heat cream, corn syrup and butter in a saucepan until it boils. Pour over the chocolate, making sure the chocolate is covered in the cream mixture. Let sit about 5 minutes and then whisk until the mixture is smooth and a pudding-like consistency.
-Pipe on bottoms of macarons, and top with another macaron.
-Let cookies sit until chocolate filling has set up.

Basic Macaron Recipe:

Ingredients
225 grams icing sugar
125 grams ground almonds
110 grams egg whites (about 4), aged overnight at room temperature
30 grams granulated sugar
Pinch of salt
Procedure
1. On three pieces of parchment, use a pencil to draw 1-inch (2.5 cm) circles about 2 inches apart. Flip each sheet over and place each sheet on a baking sheet. [Note: You only have to draw circles on the parchment paper if you want absolutely even-sized macarons. If you're skilled with piping and don't mind eyeballing the amount of batter per cookie, skip this step.]
2. Push almond flour through a tamis or sieve, and sift icing sugar. Mix the almonds and icing sugar in a bowl and set aside. If the mixture is not dry, spread on a baking sheet, and heat in oven at the lowest setting until dry. Sift almonds at least TWICE.
3. In a large clean, dry bowl whip egg whites with salt on medium speed until foamy. Increase the speed to high and gradually add granulated sugar. Continue to whip to stiff peaks—the whites should be firm and shiny.
4. With a flexible spatula, gently fold in icing sugar mixture into egg whites until completely incorporated. The mixture should be shiny and 'flow like magma.' When small peaks dissolve to a flat surface, stop mixing.
4. Fit a piping bag with a 3/8-inch (1 cm) round tip. Pipe the batter onto the baking sheets, in the previously drawn circles. Tap the underside of the baking sheet to remove air bubbles. Let dry at room temperature for 1 or 2 hours to allow skins to form.
5. Bake, in a 160C/325F oven for 10 to 11 minutes. Use a wooden spoon to keep the oven door slightly ajar, and rotate the baking sheet after 5 minutes for even baking.
6. Remove macarons from oven and transfer parchment to a cooling rack. When cool, slide a metal offset spatula or pairing knife underneath the macaron to remove from parchment.
7. Pair macarons of similar size, and pipe about 1/2 tsp of the filling onto one of the macarons. Sandwich macarons, and refrigerate to allow flavors to blend together. Bring back to room temperature before serving.

Italian Buttercream:

-2 egg whites (60 mL)
- 1/3 cup plus 1 tbsp granulated sugar
- 4 oz (½ cup) unsalted butter at room temperature, cut into slices
- 1 tsp vanilla
-1/2 tsp almond extract

In an electric mixer bowl, whisk together the egg whites and sugar. Set the bowl over a pot of simmering water and heat the mixture, whisking often, for 3 to 5 minutes, or until it feels warm and sugar has dissolved.Transfer the bowl to the electric mixer and whip warm egg mixture on high speed using the whisk attachment until stiff and shiny, 3 to 5 minutes. Add the butter, one slice at a time, and continue to mix until all the butter is thoroughly incorporated. Add any flavourings and refrigerate for 1 hour or until it becomes firm. The buttercream can be kept, covered and refrigerated for up to 1 week. (I just heated the sugar with 1 tb water until it registered 230 degrees on the candy thermometer, and poured the hot syrup into the eggs that were beaten until soft peaks with a dash o cream of tartar; whip about 5 minutes and add vanilla/almond and then the butter) If the frosting looks curdled, just keep whipping it until it becomes smooth, btw...

UPDATE:
I made the espresso macarons using the recipe above, and I had problems with it. Some of the cookies cracked, while others didn't, some developed "feet", others didn't, and for some reason, a whole pan refused to bake all the way and were still gooey inside, even after baking 5+ more minutes than the others... odd. It was pretty darn random, totally didn't make sense...
I had much better success with the basic recipe, not 100% sure why-- maybe it was the 2 tb of coconut I substituted for a little bit of almond meal, which I would NOT do again, I just couldn't get the coconut fine enough and it was a little mealy, even tho it was tasty. The coffee flavor was good, but I could easily have added more espresso powder.
I added a tb of espresso powder to the ganache, which turned out perfectly-- great recipe! I let it sit out at room temp for about an hour to get it to piping consistency, and it was excellent.
Overall, not a bad cookie, just not as "macaron" like as the basic one.
I pledged off baking until I could lose a wee bit o the winter weight I gained, but I slipped and made a quick batch today (didn't age the egg whites, only ground/sifted the almonds once-- hope they turn out!), I'm such an addict!

Books I'm Reading:

The Black Swan by Nassim Nicholas Taleb-- totally encompasses my freaky world view of randomness and the benefit of "not knowing", yet knowing... (ya know?)
Ageless by Suzanne Somers (suprisingly not lame)
Kabul Beauty School by Deborah Rodriguez
Farm Sanctuary by Gene Baur
The Principles of Uncertainty by Maira Kalman (second time thru)
Project Renewment by Bernice Bratter and Helen Dennis
How Starbucks Changed My Life by Michael Gates Gill-- very inspirational, quite a bit like my work philosophy
It's Not About the Coffee by Howard Behar (these two books make me crave coffee in the WORST way, wonder if it's all part of the great corporate scheme to make us all addicts...)
Prescription for Nutritional Health by Phyllis Balch
Being here by Ariel Kane (totally non New-Agey, very nice book)
Trail of Crumbs by Kim Sunee: why does the quest for self involve so much angst? I can totally relate, sadly. This book made me long for all things French and introduced me to a new cooking challenge: Macarons http://www.laduree.fr/ Sadly, I can only live vicariously thru the pages of this book, but it at least got me dreaming again...

Movies:
Juno: loved it! Reminded me of a young me, in all my snarky verbiosity. I only wish I was as selfless...
Last King of Scotland-- fascinating, not at all unexpected: another affirmation of the great good and incredible evil we are all capable of, given the circumstances. The question: who will *I* be when the shit goes down? As Bob as my Witless, I will die a good person, even if it is from a single gunshot to the head.
Stardust, dorky favorite of all new movies..

p.s. I scored an opportunity for DD to shadow with the local coroner for a day.. am I the very best mother in the world, or what? Of course, I'm going to go, too-- yippee! Score one for pushy moms with no shame...

Goofy

I guess if I had to use one word to describe myself, it would be "goofy":

1. I sign up for stuff in a flurry of excitement, convince myself that I really want to go inspite of much evidence to the contrary, and then at the last minute I don't want to go.


2. I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to please strangers but then blow off my family.


3. I shun real life relationships in favor of back-and-forth single paragraph blog-friendships.


4. I spend a ton of $$ to pursue things I really don't want (see #1, i.e gyms, classes, etc).


5. I volunteer for things and then don't show up (the guilt is a killer, but obviously less than the effort it takes to just show up and get involved).


6. I join groups that I know I won't fit in to to hang out with people I have nothing in common with, who I know will ultimately reject me (makes sense, no?).


7. I go to church when it bores me to tears, hate singing (in public, for all the world to see-- worse than standing there in my underwear), and am fearful of the nice people..


8. I somehow end up taking New Age classes and am then completely weirded out by how creepy and lost the people are-- and offended at their disdain for my beliefs. Why is it that sooooo many of them have completely absent/vacuous eyes, as if they have no soul?


9. I complain about having nothing to do but then sit on my ASS when I have plenty of time to get out and whip up an adventure (usually on the computer).

Etc and etc... I could go on forever.

I also realized when speaking with someone the other day that *nothing* in my life fits together:
I'm a:

• fairly conservative Christian (+/-) who loves yoga, swears like a sailor, and adores most everything else no one in my church likes (art, dirty movies on HBO... and martinis!)


• nurse who believes in alternative medicine, accupuncture, supports not vaccinating, etc


• conservative politically with a longstanding interest in protecting the environment, organic farming, alternative energy, etc and etc.
  Boo.
  
  And if all this weren't goofy enough, apparently someone I've recently gotten to know has me pegged as a baby stalker/snatcher:
  I chatted back and forth with this gal via e-mail for weeks; I offered support and assistance with my background as a nursery nurse for her concerns regarding nursing, etc --even met twice for lunch and chatted in person for several *hours*. We seemed to have quite a bit in common.
  But now that the baby's come, she tells me that her husband doesn't want me talking with her any longer; she's not interested in pursuing a friendship and doesn't want me to come and see the baby or e-mail her anymore...
  
  As if!
  
  I used to get *paid* to visit moms and babies at home, and never once had a hankering to steal, pinch, or otherwise cast an evil eye at a single one (knowing what troublesome little critters they are, and what they rapidly become has been a good deterrent). That, and it's fairly well known that I am not exactly a "baby person"; I've come to see them after so many years as a nursery nurse as, well, WORK. I'm not going to trip over myself and beg anyone to hold their baby... they all kindof look the same to me and are fairly unpredictable, wiley little creatures whose moms can do all the cooing and holding, TYVM, at least until the're about 3 and start running and jumping and talking and capable of more fun times than just crying and pooping.
  Goofy.
  I even made a super cute hand-sewed bacon n eggs bib and had the blogging ladies sign a card, but I guess I can file those away until I can find another pregnant woman to stalk and harass with my offers of trained support, friendship, and handmade gifts. Egads!
  I always thought the polite thing to do when trying to dissuade a friendship that isn't going anywhere was to not answer e-mails, phone calls, etc-- not send a creepy "Dear John my husband doesn't want me talking to you in case you're a serial killer cleverly disguised as a nurse who also happened to attend the same church I do". WHAT-everrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
  An average of 1-2 e-mails a week does not a stalker make, but it just feels strange to have someone react to you in this manner, as if you committed some huge faux pas instead of trying to be nice and make a new friend. I guess that's the risk you take when you start meeting people on the scary in-tra-net.
  But in this instance, I think she's the goofy one-- n'est pas?
  Really tho, I didn't need another nice, Christian gal to bluntly refuse to associate with me-- and another Grace (church) lady at that!
  Those women must truly be able to see me for what I REALLY am: a fairly normal person who refuses to pretend or perpetute the illusion that I'm perfect (a serious crime, I know, but one I've paid the price for in every MOPS group I've joined, Bible study, retreat, mother-daughter campout, and small group I've participated in since becoming a deeply flawed Christian. Anyhoodle).
  I suppose I should move on, before I give you the impression that my feelings are hurt... (Totally not appropriate, I know...)

On a side note, I've learned so much about myself in the last two years, it isn't even funny:
Some tidbits, mostly work related--

• I don't like office nursing. I don't like catering to all the return patients, the endless phone calls, med refills, etc and etc. I love the variety and fast pace of hospital nursing, where you see new faces quickly, over and over again.



• I don't like working all sorts of different places. I want to establish a routine with set hours, days, work duties. I'm sick of having 3 different things to learn and do, with different shifts to adjust to.



• My kids need more responsibilities
  



• I am sooo spoiled with my pool wage that I'll face any permanent position with trepidation, as it would mean a significant pay cut.
  



• I would only like to work THREE days per week at best. I function so much better and have greater home/work balance when I follow this.



• I *hate* sit down jobs where I have open ended responsibilities-- I am not good at self direction and tend to flounder about in aimlessness all day.



• I NEED TO WORK. Being home every now and again is very helpful to get stuff done about the house, but it tends to make me melancholy--neurotic, even. I was feeling pretty blue this am, but after being at work for an hour or so and forced to be perky and friendly, I completely forgot about being bummed and felt 100 times better... cheaper than therapy, and pays better, too. I noticed quite a few staff were cranky this morning, too. Must be the weather... I dread going to work in theory, but in practice it's usually better than being home all by my lonesome, surrounded by things I probably should be doing (but probably won't, tee hee).



• I really don't like doing things by myself, except shopping-- that I prefer to do alone.



• I don't want any more things in my life I have to take care of. That includes gardens, animals/pets, plants, and, of course, children (see "baby snatcher" post above).



• I have too damn many hobbies; I am strangely talented at a great many things, but not exceedingly good at ANYTHING. Some people have a passion for cooking, sewing, knitting... I'm pretty darn good at all those things and more, but have no great passion or talent for any one thing in particular. Jack of all trades, master of none (in my private life as well as at work, go figure...) . Is it a gift-- or a curse?



• I adore my husband, the super handsome guy I'm fortunate to be able to sleep with whenever I am (or HE's) awake enough to.



• I am not so worried about my kids as I let on; I think they're actually pretty smart, level headed people and will end up just FINE. I'm the one that's overreacting most of the time, while they behave like normal children.

Women Were Not Meant to Work This Hard:

This week has been hellacious, to say the least. I don't know what's going on in the world, but people were having emergency GI procedures all week, gumming up an already crazy schedule. I was schitzo woman at work, of course, being fully unprepared to work so hard after being off an entire week. But then I was the walking dead the moment I got home and had a few moments to unwind from the chaos of the day, fully able to sit and pee and eat something (but not all at once, well, maybe)...
The kids were off all week for spring break, and were bored to tears since I took the internet away whilst I was gone at work (do you remember being a kid and being bored? I would get lost in the woods and build a fort, catch frogs, or pull out the cookbooks and whip up something tasty and messy-- we lived in booneyland as kids and had no cable, no VCR, no neighbors, and I was rarely BORED). But of course the moment I got home, everyone was expecting to be fed, entertained, transported... laundry had to be done, meals prepared, library books returned...
It really bites that women these days are expected to be the breadwinners *and* still perform each and every womanly function about the household, as if she had been there all day and *not* cleaning up vomit and poop, dragging beds and patients around and starting IV's for eight hours before coming home. My husband make dinner one night that I refused to (I was deaddog tired, and ready to kill someone after finding all the items of MINE that the dog destroyed while the kids were mired in boredom, so I took a little nap), so instead of making a proper meal, he makes PIZZA. I made homemade enchiladas, stuffed peppers, etc this week, and dude slips by with PIZZA (hey, at least it's not WENDY'S, another guy favorite) and the kids revel in his manly awesomeness while Mom just looks like a slacker. Anyhoo.
Women really got the shaft in this day and age, and I've bought into it hook like and sinker... bummer.

Triumph over Geekdom:

Having lived and travelled with the Renaissance Faire, I have a special fondness for snarkiness towards people who have voluntarily chosen to live in an alternate reality (not to be confused with those whose delusions are only controllable with medication).

This clip makes me laugh soooo hard, with much snorting, cackling, and shouts from my kids to be quiet. My head even hurts a little...

=
Triumph The Insult Comic Dog - Star Wars
by ZaraV

Lazy Day:

I was off all week again, running around like a crazy person (running in circles, primarily)... but today I dragged my butt out of bed at 6am to head off to work at 7.
In the meantime, the sky opened up for no good reason and has been steadily dumping scads of snow upon our beloved spring, such that it is no longer recognizable-- boo.
Yesterday I was hanging out in a t-shirt, contemplating a motorcycle ride, today my feet are blocks of ice after stepping into an impressive snowbank with my work clogs on. Brrrrrrrr!
As such, I'm hanging out in bed with the heater turned WAAAAAAY up in hopes of thawing out the tootsies. I'm wide awake (loves me those new vitamins, good good stuff!), not a nap in sight, but it's refreshing to be chilling out doing not so much vs the frantic rush of "finding something to do", over and over again. In fact, as a testament to my laziness, I have discovered a new training activity for the dog, one I'll bet you'd never find it the training manuals: Maggie has forgotten how to play fetch over the winter, so I'm lounging in bed tossing bits of cheezy pops (the organic kind, as if it matters...) out into the hallway, using the "back" command. How very industrious, to use my slacker time to train the dog. See, if there was ever a way to be lazy *and* productive, I knew I'd find it;-)

Things That are a Gigantic Waste of $$:

1) Joining gyms/health clubs. It's fun for a while, but then the GUILT is a killer, esp when you only go once a week.
2) Getting $30 hair rinses.
3) Expensive hobbies, such as $80++ maple syrup equipment that leads to a $12 quart of syrup.
4) Private school for your resident non -scholar (this one is debatable)
5) Conferences like BOW, etc. I am so not the joiner/participator.
6) Blockbuster movies. Hellllooooo, movies from the li-ba-rar-y are FREE.
7) Endless blogging on the JT site (not exactly a waste of $, but energy; time better spent living life instead of reflecting on it to a faceless audience)

I'm sure there's more... I'll have to add to it as life hands me more examples:-)

Books:

I've decided to chronicle the books I'm reading, if only to amuse myself at a later date as to the direction of my folly; I'm guessing it'll follow the same paths it has for many a moon: health, food, humor, death.
Par example:
Fast Track One day Detox Diet, Ann Louise Gittleman
Ageless, Suzanne Somers
Passionate Vegetarian, Crescent Dragonwagon
Prescription for Dietary Wellness, Phyllis A. Balch
101 Ways to Help Your Daughter Love Her Body, Brenda Lane Richardson and Elane Rehr
The Sweet Potato Queens Guide to Raising Children for Fun and Profit, Jill Conner Browne
The Bone Woman, Clea Koff

Movies I'm watching:
Mr and Mrs Smith
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (a repeat, I loved this movie)
August Rush
Gone Baby Gone

March 15, cont.

I had a luv-er-lee day, spending 5 *freaking* hours at the Vicci salon with ms. gracy pants getting her $80 'do. Sheesh! I got a $30 color rinse that I could have paid a whole $8 from the Walgreens for, but I guess it was nice to have a hand and scalp massage, probably made it worth the cost:-) I loves me some pampering! I also had the great fun of picking up a super cool piece of Redwing pottery, a very odd looking vase from the 50's. It's slightly broken, but still the coolest $1.99 vase I've seen in a long time. Besides, it saves me and mine the trouble of breaking it, a highly likely inevitability.
I'm in the midst of wathing a really nice movie, "August Rush"; it's a sweet tale about hope in the midst of brokenness. Life should always have happy endings.
The snow is almost gone (no love lost there), so I *finally* spread the 5 gallon bucket of prairie seeds I harvested in the fall back into the prairie in hopes that it will snow at least once more to press them down into the soil. It's funny, tho-- since the snow is gone, I can see the seed heads I broadcast *before* the snow fell (and we had a LOT), and they look as if they were never buried at all for months under the tremedous weight of the winter. I just hope that the seeds don't get croaked in the cold, frosty weather that's sure to come at least a few more times, but I just can't imagine that it would happen... the other seeds live under the snow and do great. Maybe I should mow them in to break up the seedheads and get them closer to the soil? Who knows...I'm surely no botanist...
Hey!
I broke down and bought some maple tapping supplies the other day-- as if I can't get myself more deeply in debt:-( Jacob expressed an interest in tapping the 20 some trees on our property, and who am I to squelch a fleeting childhood curiosity? Lord knows I'm still full of them myself, as much as I try to pretend I'm old and cynical... Jake was none too thrilled, as I'm sure he saw this as one more strange thing I'll wrangle him into against his will (poor guy;-) But it'll be fun. And even tho we only have silver maples, I know our syrup will be tasty.
And ours.
Which is the coolest thing of all...
I also finally got around to mucking out the chicken coop, poor stinky girls. I don't have any idea *why* the coop would be soooooo caked with wet bedding, but it is. And it was HARD to scrape out of there... I love cleaning the coop, I love being outside, especially in weather like today's: Jacob rode his bike, jumped on the trampoline, went for a walk with ms. maggie-- me, I picked up slimy mountains of dog poop that were once buried by the snow and shoveled chicken nasties, but I couldn't have been more thrilled to be doing it.
I LOVE SPRING!
(I'd love living in Austin better, but I'll take whatever bonuses of living in the north that I can in an effort to keep from losing my mind in the interim until I become a resident of the south again as God intended...)
I'm off all of next week, unless I get called in. Here's to hoping I can get the Austin account down in my time off, here's to more fantastic vegetarian cooking. I made some (natural) chicken stir fry with a coconut-peanut sauce tonight with asian veggies and bean thread noodles. I thought I had soba noodles left in the cupboard, but they magically disappeared, boo. The bean noodles were interesting, almost looked like something that would crawl out somebody's butt (sorry! I really am...), but once you blocked that unpleasant thought from your mind, they weren't too bad. Probably have NO nutritional value, but didn't make you gag otherwise;-O
ttfn, Lillith Lunch tomorrow with the blogging gals-- here's to hoping none are axe murderers (which would suck).

March 15

The weather's been quite nice these past few days, upper 40's, low 50's... the massive piles of snow have been melting quickly, turning the yard into these odd, floating, glacier type structures (the water is flowing underneath the ice, never seen that before).
The gardens were finally exposed, and a bit of ground heave must have happened-- some of the bulbs are completely out of the ground, and quite a few are already sending up shoots. It looks like the daffodills were already blooming at the end of this month, but no obvious signs of the daffs coming up just yet.
We lost a chicken a couple weeks ago during our Austin trip; too bad she couldn't hang on for the warmer weather. She was one of the older girls, I'm surprised we haven't lost more of them this year.
Steak and BJ day was a huge success! We went to the meat market out in Elkhorn yesterday at the LAST minute to pick up some localy raised steaks. They were *by far* the best steaks we have ever eaten, bar none! Jake barely grilled them, so they were quite rare, and they cut like butter and tasted divine. I also bought a large bag of meat, burger and etc, I'm looking forward to some juicy burgers, my long time arch nemesis of vegetarianism. I'll have to stop back up in a few weeks and pick up some more; hopefully I can convince Jake to make the leap and get 1/4 cow for the freezer. Otherwise, nooooo more meat for this girl, I'm moving towards a more vegetarian diet anyway... I just can't support such a toxic industry for a product I barely like, anyway.

2 Variations on a Theme/Enchiladas:

I am *desperate* to get my account of our trip to Austin on the blog; here's to hoping that I get around to it before I FORGET some of the finer details.... (of course, I could always make stuff up, but I'm getting tired of that:-)

Anyhoodle:
I created two different enchilada-type recipes, having been inspired by our culinary journey to parts south into the land of waaaaay better food.
Here's the first, made last week (non-veggie version)
Chorizo and Buffalo stuffed poblanos (and enchiladas)
Mix 1 pound (raw) ground buffalo (or any other ground meat) in a mixing bowl with 1.5 tubes (raw) beef chorizo, 3/4 of a large onion (chopped), 1 tsp oregano, 1/2 tsp pan toasted cumin seed, the chopped tops of the poblanos (about 1/3 to 1/2 cup), 1/2 cup hominy (add after meat/veggies have been fairly well mixed so it doesn't get too squashed)
Stuff mix into 6 good sized poblanos that have had the tops removed and have been slit down the front. Place in a 9x13 inch pan (which has a wee bit o enchilada sauce, your recipe or prepared, in the bottom..), cover the peppers a bit with more enchilada sauce, and put a few random clumps of roasted veggie salsa on top (see recipe below). Cover with foil, and bake for 45 minutes at 375.
Serve, sprinkled with cheese and sauce from pan, with addl. veggie salsa.

There was a good amount of the meat mixture left, so I threw together a batch of enchiladas, using up the leftover enchilada sauce as well. I warmed 6 corn tortillas in the microwave (until soft), put some sauce in the baking pan, rolled each tortilla up with 1/8 cup (pan fried) meat mix and a sprinkle of cheese. I then warmed up the 6 remaining tortillas and filled up another small pan, covered them all up with enchilada sauce, sprinkled on some cheese, and then put them in the freezer. Now I can be a lazy-booty some other day when I have no motivation to cook (which has been far too often lately)!

Tonight's recipe (vegetarian):
cut one package of tempeh into 1 inch cubes and boil in water for 5 minutes, cool and chop. Saute 1/4 cup choppped onion, 1/2 cup chopped red bell pepper, 1/2 finely cubed zucchini, 1/4 cup finely chopped mushrooms and 1 clove chopped garlic in saute pan, about 5 mintes until softened. Add 1 tb (+/- to taste) chili powder, 1/2 tube vegetarian chorizo, 1/2 cup of the tempeh cooking water, 1/2 cup roasted veggie salsa (recip below), and 1/2 cup hominy. Heat until bubbly. Add 1/2 cup plain yogurt, stir to incorporate, and then add chopped tempeh.
Fill 8 whole wheat tortillas each with 1/2 cup filling, and place in a pan (again, put enchilada sauce on bottom). Top enchiladas with sauce and a sprinkling of cheese. Cover with foil and bake at 350-375 for 30 minutes, (if desired, remove foil and bake for an addl 5 minutes).

Tas-tee, and only the pickiest and stinkiest eaters will know that something is amiss with these enchiladas-- even my hubby complimented them (and nooooo, he didn't say they were "interesting"). Serve with a big ole veggie salad, topped with Newman's Own Lime Vinaigrette...

PAMELA JONES' ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE ROASTED VEGETABLE SALSA (ADAPTED) From "The Passionate Vegetarian" by Crescent Dragonwagon
MAKES ABOUT TWO CUPS


2 Roma or plum tomatoes, halved
4 tomatillos, husked and halved
1/2 small onion, chopped
4 cloves garlic, with skins on
1-2 serrano chili peppers, whole
1 ancho or poblano chili, whole
2 whole hot Hungarian wax pepper,
2 whole jalapeño chili,
1 tablespoon virgin olive oil
1-3 tablespoons cilantro, stemmed
1/4 teaspoon kosher or sea salt
1/4 teaspoon cumin seeds, toasted (optional)
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Combine tomatoes, tomatillos, onion, garlic, chilies, and peppers in a container with a fitted cover. Toss with oil and spread on non-stick baking sheets (probably 2).


Bake at 400 until peppers are blistered (about 40 minutes).


When cool enough to handle, peel, stem and seed the peppers (use gloves to protect skin). Place peppers, tomatoes, tomatillos and onions in a food processor.


Squeeze garlic out of their skins and buzz until smooth. Add cilantro, salt, and cumin seed to taste. Keeps in the refrigerator for up to a week.

I've Been Looking for This All Afternoon:

It's pretty amazing that I found it, considering I had *no* idea where I first saw this video, and no idea what the artist's name was.
But I remember seeing it a few weeks ago, and thinking: if you could see inside my brain at any given moment, this is what it would look like.

Cool AND scary, no?

My Majorly Messed Up Week:

Jake was away the *entire* week at a class up in Minneapolis, leaving me and the kids to fend for ourselves...
Does he NOT realize that we are completely helpless in his absence, and depend solely on his mercy for our miserable existences?

Well, not exactly. But here's a recap of our misfourtunes, in chronological order:
1) I really prided myself on taking the kids to go skating 2 towns over at the Ice Plex; I don't usually venture out too far when the hubby's gone, since who the heck is going to rescue us in the likely event that I will do something foolish and strand myself somewhere?
We got down there ok, just as the snow started to fall.... and then 2 hours later as the skating session ended, found ourselves in the throes of a snowstorm with near zero visibility. Whilst driving 25 miles on the interstate, trying not to slide into the ditch, ever helpful Jacob was repeating "we're never going to make it" over and over again, which really calmed the whole group tremendously.
2 hours later, we arrived at home, only to see that the massive snow storm ceased less than one mile from our house. Doomed, we are. Doooooooooomed!

2) Since I am never 100% sure what my husband's up to, I wisely chose this week to pile on the hours at work so I can get the full "single parent" experience I've narrowly skirted all these years. After getting home so late the night before and taking time to de-stress before sleeping a good 5-6 hours, I slogged myself to work. Exhausted, I slogged home afterwards, looking forward to a little nappy-poo to freshen myself up before the kids got home. After numberous phone and puppy interruptions, I finally drifted off, only to hear Maggie CHOMP CHOMP CHOMPING on a bone-ish sounding object. Now, our house is pretty puppy proof these days, so I didn't give it a second thought, until I realized in my growing lucidity that the sound wasn't *really* all that bone-like, and just then Maggie came up and proudly showed me what she had been chewing on: a BRAND NEW bottle of ibuprofen.
YaaaaAAAAAaaa!
Quick! Look up how to induce vomiting in a dog.
Quick! Look up dosage! Find syringe, find hydrogen peroxide... find that hydrogen peroxide is 99% gone-- just enough!
Chain dog up, squirt stuff in her mouth, drag her outside and wait for it to work... and WAIT, and WAIT, and WAIT.....
FINALLY! She barfed. I didn't see any tablets in her vomit, but since she chewed the tabs pretty good, she still probably got at least a little in her belly...
Call the vet, rush her off to the vet, hope she doesn't barf in my car.
Vet wants to keep her for 2 days of IV therapy, I convince him that something less drastic is probably in order (since I didn't see any tablets in the urp), so he sub-q's her with fluids and sends her home with me looking like a lopsided camel.
Barf barf barf, all night long; green, nasty stuff that doesn't want to come out of the carpet.
The next night, she started waking up every 2 hours, soaked in urine, needing to go out and pee ginormous volumes of dilute urine. She also started drinking obsessively, yet her behavior continued otherwise to be 100% normal. Go figure... not exactly the picture of renal failure I thought I'd see..
So I leave work early on Wed to take her back to the vet AGAIN, to check labwork. BUN slightly elevated, creatinine WNL, blood sugar slightly elevated... nothing. Doc is stumped. In the meantime, Maggie is drinking and peeing more than ever, about every 15 minutes or so.

The Koehler household has now become a body fluid cesspool, pee and vomit, filthy wet towels dripping everywhere. I construct an elaborate fence to keep the girl out of the living room, since the day before she hopped over the living room fence and proceeded to dump out all of Jake's plants for the 43rd time, rolled the dirt all over the floor, and then peed and vomited all over the whole mess. Egads! Like something out of a horror flick...
It took at least 2.5 hours to clean up, and I'm happy to report that Jake's plants now live on the porch. In 23 degree weather. Wonder if they'll make it...
For the next 2 nights she was up every 2 hours needing to pee and have a complete change of bedding in her kennel, and activity which lended itself poorly to sleep and was a nasty chore at 12, 2, and 4 am.
Finally, last night I had an epiphany: doggie diapers! It's a wonder what an old stash of pull ups and a roll of duct tape can accomplish... a full night's sleep for the dog and I are only one of them.
I took some urine in today for an eval (to rule out a bladder infection #1, and maybe diabetes #2). Dr thinks it may be Addison's disease if nothing else pops up, but her urine showed rare WBC's, and since the sample was so dilute, decided to put her on an antibiotic.
Wish my girl a bit o luck-- kidney failure sucks major heinie.
3) On Monday, the basement flooded. Bad.
4) On Wednesday, I discovered that a pipe had burst, which was why the basement was flooded. Ohwell, better late than never... at least I figured *that* much out.
5) On Tuesday, we got the biggest snow storm in YEARS, and no, I have no clue how to work the snowblower (or the plow, which was broken anyway). For those of you who know us, our driveway is at least the length of a football field, so hand shoveling was SO not happening, esp since the snow was soooo wet, heavy, and almost didn't stop for 3 days.
In a moment of desperation I called a friend's hubby who is in the 'biz (the snow removal biz), who told me he'd rustle me up a guy to "take care of me".
Now, I didn't like the sound of that either, so when the dude called, all eager to come over and "check it out", I got a little creeped out... and shore 'nuff, when I told the guy I wasn't going to be home and to call me with an estimate, he sounded a little disappointed and a little less eager.
Go figure.
So wonder of all wonders I never heard back from him, and thus can't help but ponder if he was looking for a little sumpin' sumpin' for his plow job, perhaps not realizing that I'd rather chew my arm off.
But my most excellent husband saved the day by calling the neighbors from his hotel in Minnesota, who graciously came and plowed the driveway, sans sexual favors.
Hallelujah! There IS a God.
6) Tuesday was also a crazy day at work, where I forgot in my frenzy that Jacob had to be picked up at 3:30. So of course, when I realized this at 3:23, I had to tell the charge nurse "I have to GOOOOOOoooooooo. Right NOW!", while simultaenously barking instructions at Gracy on my cell phone to "meet me at the car, NOW"! She must have detected the urgency in my voice, as she did not utter one word of protest at having to ambulate a distance greater than from the couch to her bed to the computer desk. Jacob was the lone kid, left at school with no ride, so I'm sure it was evident to the staff that his loser mom finally rousted from her cracked out haze to come and get her kid. I dropped him off at his enrichment class just as the heaviest snow of the storm started to fall.... and was another 10 minutes late picking him *up* from class, as well;-)
7) Friday I called home on a whim to see if the kids had gotten off to school ok, to discover that Jacob's bus hadn't arrived yet, 30 minutes past his pickup time. Grrrrrrrrrrr! The poor boy has to stand on a fairly busy county highway that was especially slippery that day and surely addled with pedophiles, and thus I was none too happy that he was standing out there all alone for all that time. If the kid is 30 seconds late for the bus, he's completely out of luck... but if the middle aged weiners at the bus company are 30 MINUTES late, it's too bad, so sad. Another no win situation for kids everywhere. Boo.
I called the bus company to inquire about the delay, to hear the message "This is Julie's phone, leave a message". Huh???
What sort of business that deals with parents is that cluless about phone etiquette?
One that wants to make me crazy, that's what.
When I reached the Julie in question, I was short with her, telling her that if the bus passed him by while he ran to tell me it never came, she was going to pick him up HER self. Raaaarrrrrrrrrr! Pissed off momma, hear me roar!
And of course, completely terrified at my rare display of backbone, she told me "no I'm not".
Whatever, beyotch.
Work was soooo flippin crazy that day, too, that I wasn't able to call until a few hours later to see if the boy got the bus; but I really didn't want to know, anyway, since I knew I'd have to find the chutzpah to make good on my threat to Ms. Julie, and I really wasn't up to it anymore. Garrrr!
8) Finally, Jake arrived home, yesterday--a 1/2 hour before expected-- yaaaaaaay!
We went out for a lovely dinner at a local, upscale spot. Our dinners were nice, we had a good time... only to notice Jake had a DEAD FLY on his plate where his food once lay.
Soooooooo, I guess it's *not* just me with the loser luck... and somehow, that makes me feel just a little better.
p.s. I had a nice glass of gevurztraminer with my meal last night, and got downright giddy, even after a few sips. And wouldn't ya know it, I felt like DEATH warmed over for most of this morning.
I drank tons of water and green tea, and finally felt more like myself with 100% more energy towards noon, hurrah!
I miss my wine, but it's not worth it! Clearly, I'm on to something...

Liver Update

For the life-challenged among you who are waiting with bated breath for updates concerning the welfare of my liver, your agony is over:

1. I've not drank a drop of alcohol for 3 weeks now. I feel like 850,000% better, btw-- and I only drank 1-2 glasses of wine/day (no, I was not a boozer, just consistently sodden each night).
2. I finally got my order from Vita Cost--woo hoo! I am now taking more herbs/supplements than foods, and could probably pile them in a cereal bowl each morning, pour milk on top (if I was drinking any..) and take them like that. I also tossed out each beauty item that contained parabens and replaced it with a non paraben item. (parabens= estrogen) So far, the Burt's Bees grapefruit shampoo an conditioner is fabulous (and you can't beat the price!). I got samples of the Emerita facial products, which I really love, but Vita Cost doesn't carry them yet and they're too $$ everywhere else.
3. I've been exercising about every other day for an hour and tanning for 8 minutes (helloooooo vitamin D! I think this is what's really giving me all the energy...)
4. No more caffeine, less crap in my diet. My digestion has been really really slow, but I'm hoping the chewable licorice I got today will help. Tonight I had pizza, and had not a single problem-- which is pretty dang amazing considering *water* was giving me the urps at the beginning of the week.
   
5. I d/c'ed the black cohosh, raspberry leaf, and evening primrose oil (all=estrogen). I've also d/c'ed the flax oil (a la "Genotype Diet", which recommended that I avoid lignans) and replaced it with fish oil. Apparently this is also supposed to help me with my mood, so yippie freaking yahooey for that!
6. Here's a list of the supplements I'm taking, if only to impress you with the depths my supplement obsession:

• Natrol Calcium D-Glucarate -- 60 Tablets
  NSI Alpha Lipoic Acid -- 100 mg - 120 Capsules
  Planetary Formulas Full Spectrum Ashwagandha -- 570 mg - 120 Tablets
  Nature's Answer Valerian Root -- 180 Capsules
  Nature's Herbs Chasteberry Power -- 60 Capsules
  NSI Schizandra -- 1160 mg - 120 cp
  Enzymatic Therapy DGL (Fructose-Free) -- 100 Chews
  NSI Herbal Liver Support -- 950 mg - 120 Capsules
  Source Naturals Theanine Serene -- 120 Tablets NSI CoQ10 -- 100 mg - 120 capsules Emerita Pro-Gest -- 4 oz

We went ice skating this afternoon for a couple hours, and had an absolute blast! I could do that over and over... now if only I could get the sensation back in my legs.

With all the exercise I've been getting lately, you'd think I'd be losing weight like crazy, but I'm not :-( It *does* seem like my cycle is going to be fairly normal this month, tho, which makes all the craziness worth while. But really, something has to change when you do 100 crunches a few times a week, right? Let's hope that there's justice in the world and I have a flat, muscular tummy before swimsuit season hits;-)