Thursday, October 9, 2008


I laugh when I hear that the fish in the water is thirsty:
You do not yet see that the Real is in your own home,
and you wander from forest to forest listlessly...
Here is the truth!
Go where you will,
to Benares or to Mathura;
If you do not find God in your your own soul,
the world will be meaningless to you.

I used to like that poem, ages and ages ago... and every so often it pops back into my brain for one random reason or another--in fact, it woke me up this morning at 5:30 and I haven't been able to sleep since, go figure.
Personally, I think God took an extended vacation from my soul and thus have been moving about in a haze ever since... and unfortunately, even tho church and its accoutrements are a nice filler material, they haven't had the staying power to keep me from wandering the forest all these years...
And altho I enjoy the travails of wandering, find neither purpose nor direction lately and would like to focus my efforts, find a guidemap so I can make sense of where I am, where I've been, and where I'm headed.

Dreamed of my hometown last night, of no one event in particular... just of the feeling I get sometimes when I'm there, when I was there, and woke up with Kabir in my head.

Another spin class song; usually I'm not one to form a connection to a song right away, but when you have the resistance cranked up to 17, your legs are on fire and you can barely breathe... closing your eyes and focusing on the beat, the voice, and the lyrics can really pull you through:

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