Eggnog Cupcakes

Eggnog Cupcakes:

(double this recipe to make 24 cupcakes)
1/4 cup dark rum or bourbon
1 cup eggnog
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1 tsp vanilla extract
scant 1/4 tsp nutmeg, freshly ground
1 cup sugar
1 1/3 cups all purpose flour
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
Preheat oven to 350F. Fill a 12-cup muffin tin with liners.In a small bowl, mix together rum, eggnog, vegetable oil, vinegar and vanilla.In a large bowl, mix together nutmeg, flour, sugar, baking soda, baking powder and salt. Pour in rum mixture and whisk until just combined. Divide evenly into muffin tins (a 1/4 cup measure is a good tool for this).Bake for 18-20 minutes, until a tester comes out clean and the cakes spring back when lightly pressed.Cool in the pan for 3-5 minutes, then turn out onto a wire rack to cool completely before filling.

OR:
Prepare a yellow "pudding in the mix", following directions but substituting eggnog for the liquid and adding 1/4 tsp nutmeg and 1/4 cup dark rum. Fill cupcake liners and bake, allow to cool.


Eggnog Pastry Cream

- 1 cup eggnog (do not use fat-free)
- 1 cup whole milk
-4 egg yolks
- 1/3 cup sugar
- ¼ cup flour
- ¼ cup cornstarch
- ¼ teaspoon ground nutmeg
- Heaping ¼ teaspoon salt
- 1/4 cup rum

1. In a medium saucepan over medium-low heat, bring the eggnog and milk to a simmer.
2. While the mixture is heating, whisk together egg yolks, sugar, flour, cornstarch, nutmeg, salt and vanilla in a medium bowl.
2. Temper the egg mixture by slowly whisking in 1/3 to ½ of the heated eggnog mixture, then whisk the tempered egg mixture back into the eggnog mixture in the saucepan. Return the pan to a medium-low to medium burner, bring the mixture to a low boil, and cook, whisking constantly, for about 4 to 6 minutes total, or until mixture is very thick. (Be careful not to overcook or the eggs will scramble.)
3. Strain the mixture through a fine sieve into a bowl and press a piece of plastic wrap on the surface to prevent a skin from forming. Let cool to room temperature, then refrigerate to chill for at least 2 hours.
Fill cupcakes with pastry cream (thin with eggnog if too thick).

Whipped cream marshmallow frosting:

Funny story-- it was getting pretty late, and I only had less than an hour to get the frosting made and on the cupcakes (and get cleaned up and dressed for the party..). So instead of making stabilized whipped cream using gelatin (which doesn't always work out well anyway, especially when rushed), I remembered that I had a container of "Marshmallow Fluff" in the cupboard. So basically what I did was:
Whipped a pint of whipping cream until soft peaks began to form using a chilled balloon whisk attachment and chilled mixing bowl, and then added a small container of marshmallow fluff and 1/4 cup rum. Whip this until stiff peaks form, and then pipe onto cupcakes. Sprinkle with nutmeg to taste. Chill cupcakes until ready to serve, allowing them to sit at room temperature for one hour.

The Solitary Life, Lamb Orichette, continued:

If I were on my own, I'd eat this three times a week (at least):

Pinn Oak Farms lamb sausage, removed from the casings and browned with red pepper flakes and fresh minced garlic to taste, sauteed with broccoli rabe, cut into 1" pieces until crisp-tender, and tossed with orichette pasta that's been drizzled with a good quality olive oil. I'd top this all with crumbled chevre and eat it with large quantities of red wine (which tastes mind numbingly amazing when combined with the goat cheese).

And I would never feel guilty about going to the gym. Or have pets that bark.

White Chocolate Ganache Buttercream:

Recipe I need to write down before I forget:

1 bag white chocolate chips
8 oz whipped cream
1 stick unsalted butter
4 cups powdered sugar (+/-, depending on your desired sweetness and stiffness)


The momentary sadness I felt at being discouraged from participating in the harming of my body (hence the monniker "Bruisers", my husband reminded me with less sympathy than I felt was kind...) has now been replaced with the realization that bruises hurt, a lot;-) And limping at work, while entertaining for a day, got old pretty quick-- especially when I really and truly couldn't walk normally as I am usually able to feign when sustaining little peepee injuries in the past.


Without a doubt, there were aspects of the experience that were a ton of fun: feeling strong, fast, and incredibly powerful; the overall joy of skating that makes me high as a kite. Falling and bouncing back up as if nothing had happened was also very cool, as was the momentary sting of pain I felt that gave no true indication of how much I was going to hurt every time I needed to use that particular body part for the duration of the week.


Pushing myself has always been one of my favorite pasttimes, spin class being the best example of that; knowing how sick I can make myself after cranking my gears a little too heavily, spinning my wheel until I see stars, feel faint, and keep on smiling, begging for more. Abusing myself has been a source of good, clean fun for a long, long, time-- but have I finally crossed a line?


Part of me thinks that I made the three hour experience that much more difficult by skating two hours just an hour before the Boot Camp, because surely the only thing more difficult than skating "balls to the wall" for three hours is skating hard for FIVE hours in a day, no?


Was THAT stroke of foolishness the true cause of my misery today? Or was the experience itself just that much out of my league??


I would have thought that my daily abuses on the spin bike would have qualified me for a pain free post-Boot Camp experience (minus the falls I took cause I was getting overwhelmed and tired); haven't wiped myself out like that, not even after birthing a 10# baby in 45 minutes (in which I barely broke a sweat, btw) or hiking down a 15 miles trail into the Arizona desert in July completely unequipped (fringed, knee high moccasins and all). But there it was: my ass was kicked in a wholly new way, sending the fear of pain I've only nodded at blankly in my Pain Clinic patients deeply into my bones, my psyche (some of which hurt to this day...).

And so here I sit, faintly more prepared with my padded pants, better hand/wrist guards, a plan in place to take it easier, try not to overdo it in spite of myself... but for what?? Do I REALLY want to join a team? Do I have the time? Can my family withstand the impact of my life expanding in this way??

Questions for another day, because for now I'm just going to take it one moment at a time, to "just do, don't think", which has bcome my mantra (in addition to "do one thing everyday that scares you":

(A newspaper column by Mary Schmich, published by the Chicago Tribune on 01 June 1997):
Inside every adult lurks a graduation speaker dying to get out, some world-weary pundit eager to pontificate on life to young people who'd rather be Rollerblading. Most of us, alas, will never be invited to sow our words of wisdom among an audience of caps and gowns, but there's no reason we can't entertain ourselves by composing a Guide to Life for Graduates.I encourage anyone over 26 to try this and thank you for indulging my attempt.Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97:

Wear sunscreen.If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine. Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing every day that scares you. Sing. Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours. Floss. Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements. Stretch. Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone. Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.Read the directions, even if you don't follow them. Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young. Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.Respect your elders.Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.But trust me on the sunscreen. Copyright © 2006, Chicago Tribune

Routine/Pommes Anna, Date Nut Squares:

I've always always admired people whose lives revolved around some sort of orderly routine; spaghetti Wednesday, pizza on Friday, Sunday dinner...

Me, I can't set up or maintain a routine if my life depended on it, despite my best intentions, as if the reigning chaos of possibility (which usually means we do NOTHING, truth be told) is preferrable to the predictability of SOMETHING, even if it's familiar.
But the lure of the familiar continues to pull, making me yearn for a life where just a little bit is already decided:


That being said, if I had to set up a basic routine for the winter months, this is (loosely) what it would look like:

1. Saturday: swimming with Jacob in the morning; cleaning the house with the kids/starting laundry; skating in the evening (or not if we decide to go out somewhere else)


2. Sunday: big Sunday breakfast, church maybe and/or skiing (winter), visiting with family, planning menus and grocery shopping


3. Monday: Spin class for me 3:30 or 5:30; Grace, Youth Group 6:30-8


4. Tuesday: Spin class for me 4:30 and/or $2 skating 6-8pm with Jacob and Grace


5. Wednesday: work until 7; Jacob, Youth Group 6:30-8; maybe skating for Jake and I from 8-10 (over 21 skate)


6. Thursday: Spin class for me 4:30; Jake has archery


7. Friday: Spin class for me 5:15; pizza and gym/swim night, Family time from 5:30-8

This works, and has plenty of wiggle room to cram extra things in there, novel stuff I always like to do but have difficulty dragging anyone to (my children are hopeless homebodies).

I'm hoping to broaden my horizons by checking out a Roller Derby game (show?) on March 14 if anyone wants to go; in my crazy scheming mind I picture myself joining a team someday but realize that I am probably too non confrontational to have any success with it;-)

On the food front, made some truly fantastic potatoes this morning to go with our Sunday breakfast (see? the schedule is already a rousing success!). Loosely fashioned after "pommes Anna", I just improvised it on the spot and it was pretty tasty:

3 large red potatoes, scrubbed and sliced 1/8 thick: layer slices in a single concentric layer, on microwave safe plate, sprinkle with kosher salt, and microwave for 3 minutes

Meanwhile, preheat oven to 400 degrees and heat 12 inch cast iron skillet to barely smoking; when pan is ready, pour 2-3 tb olive oil and 1 large chopped clove garlic into pan, and slide potatoes on top, maintaining concentric, single layer of potatoes. Sprinkle with fresh chopped rosemary and pepper, more salt if desired. Place plate on top and cover with heavy lid (to weight potatoes down) and put in oven. Bake for 25 minutes until potatoes are browned.

Here's a REAL pommes Anna recipe, one I was too lazy to look up, if you want to do it up right:

Ingredients
1 1/2 pounds russet (baking) potatoes
1/2 stick (1/4 cup) unsalted butter, melted
Preparation
Peel the potatoes and, using a food processor fitted with the slicing blade or a mandoline, slice them very thin, transferring them as they are sliced to a large bowl of cold water. Drain the slices and pat them dry between paper towels. Generously brush the bottom and side of a 9-inch heavy ovenproof skillet, preferably non-stick, with some of the butter and in the skillet arrange the slices, overlapping them slightly, in layers, brushing each layer with some of the remaining butter and seasoning it with salt and pepper. Cover the layered potato slices with a buttered round foil, tamp down the assembled potato cake firmly, and bake it in the middle of a preheated 425°F. oven for 30 minutes. Remove the foil and bake the potato cake for 25 to 30 minutes more, or until the slices are tender and golden. Invert the potato cake onto a cutting board and cut it into 8 wedges.

Later:
Also made some date nut squares, mostly due to the fact that I somehow ended up with a 5# box of chopped dates (Sam's Club, but why exactly did I buy it? No clue...)

Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Pulse in food processor until it has a sandy texture:
1 cup whole wheat flour
1/4 cup ground flax
1/4 cup oat bran
1/4 +/- pecans
1/4 cup sugar
1 stick butter

Press into bottom of 8 inch square pan and bake for 15 minutes until slightly browned

Soften 2 cups chopped dates in enough boiling water to cover for 10 minutes, drain well. Mix with 2 eggs and 1/4 cup agave nectar (or brown sugar). Spread over crust and bake 20-30 minutes until center is set. So yummy and sweet, and somewhat good for you...

Grace's Birthday Cheesecake:

Modified from the Wilton recipe, and pretty dang fabulous:-)

Crust:
1 1/2 cup (or more) crushed chocolate cookies (pulsed in the food processor until fine),
1/2 (+/-) cup melted butter
1/4 cup sugar
Mix all ingerdients, and press into bottom and sides of spring form pan. Bake at 325 degrees for 8-10 minutes, cool.

Ganache:
8 oz good quality semisweet chocolate, chopped (or milk chocolate, whatever floats yer chocolate boat)
1 cup whipping cream

Place chocolate in medium oven safe bowl. Heat whipping cream in saucepan or in microwave just to boiling point (or until bubbles start to form around edges of pan). Remove from heat, pour on top of chocolate. Allow to sit for a minute, then stir until smooth and glossy. Set aside on counter.

Cheesecake Filling:
3 (8 ounce) packages cream cheese, softened (do NOT use low or fat free, which would be sick and wrong and would ruin the whole concept of decadence you're striving for)
3/4 cup sour cream (see above)
6 eggs
1 cup granulated sugar
1 1/4 tsp real vanilla extract
1/4 tsp almond extract
1 pint fresh raspberries (or frozen, it matters not;-)

Preheat oven to 325 degrees. In a large bowl, beat cream cheese until light and fluffy. Beat in sour cream and add eggs, one at a time. Beat in sugar and flavoring extracts until mixture is smooth. Spread thin layer of ganache over the crust and top with the raspberries, saving some for garnish. Place spring form pan on baking sheet. Pour cheese mixture over raspberries. Place a small pan of water on bottom rack of oven. Bake cheesecake 1 1/4 to 1 1/2 hours or until set(the middle might be slightly soft).
Turn oven off and leave for one hour.
Cool and refrigerate for at least 4 hours.
Spread remaining chocolate (kept at room temp or remove from fridge a good 2 hours before using) over cheesecake, refrigerating at least 30 min to allow ganache to become firm.
Garnish with fresh raspberries.

Pretty Tasty Crock Pot Pepper Steak

I am a wee bit if a food snob and soooooooo not a fan of crock pot cookery, but Grace requested this dish. And seeing as how I had no time to stand over the stove and watch it, into the crock pot it went.
Lo and behold! It was pretty darn good:

2 pounds beef sirloin steak or round steak, (cut on the bias against the grain) into 2 inch strips
3 tablespoons vegetable oil
1 medium onion, cut in half and then into thick slices
2 cloves garlic, minced
3 tb apple cider vinegar
1 tb beef bouillon
1/4 cup hot water
1 tablespoon cornstarch
1/2 cup chopped onion
2 large green bell peppers, halved and sliced thick
1 (14.5 ounce) can stewed tomatoes, with liquid
1/4 cup soy sauce
1 tsp Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon white sugar
1 teaspoon salt
Pepper to taste
Shake of hot sauce
DIRECTIONS
In medium dutch oven over medium high heat, heat the vegetable oil and brown the seasoned beef strips in two batches. Transfer to a slow cooker.
Place onions in dutch oven and continue to cook until softened, about 5 minutes. Add garlic, and sautee about 30 seconds. Add apple cider vinegar, beef bouillon, and water and deglaze the pan, scraping up brown bits from the pan. Sprinkle cornstarch on top, and stir.
Pour into the slow cooker with meat, add remaining ingredients, placing green peppers on top (stir them in half way, if you can).
Cover, and cook on High for 3 to 4 hours, or on Low for 6 to 8 hours.
Serve on top of mashed potatoes...

Smoove B's Recipes for Seduction:

From the Onion:

Carrot Chocolate Chip Muffins
Smoove B
Many a novice love man errs on the side of putting too much emphasis on the dinner as a means of seduction. This is a mistake. One must remember that all snacks and courses that you prepare for your girl are part of the larger seduction. Often missed but highly important is the fare you provide for her after a long night of sweet lovemaking. The correct breakfast-time food can be the ticket that she will redeem for another night of seduction and doggy style sexing.
Smoove likes these Carrot Chocolate Chip Muffins in his morning meal, easy to prepare and moist. Enjoy.
Ingredients:
1 1/2 cups of all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 1/2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon nutmeg
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
1/4 teaspoon allspice
2 large eggs
2/3 cup of sugar
1 1/2 cups of finely shredded carrots
1/4 cup orange juice
5 tablespoons of warm, melted unsalted butter
1/2 cup of chopped walnuts
1/2 cup of mini chocolate chips
The first thing that you will want to do is pre-heat the oven to 400 degrees. While the oven is heating to this temperature, you will want to grease a 12 muffin tin pan with either butter or non-stick cooking spray. I prefer the cooking spray as it is easy and does not add flavors you may not want. If you prefer your muffins extra buttery, I would then recommend the melted butter.
The next step to take is to mix the eggs and sugar together in a small bowl. Add the finely shredded carrots to this bowl and let the mixture sit for 10 minutes. If you have any doubts as to whether the carrots are shredded finely enough, ask yourself, "Are these carrots shredded finely enough?" If the answer is no, then I suggest that you discard the ones you have and shred some more. Many questions about cooking can be answered if you look deeply within yourself.
Next, grasp a larger bowl and mix together the flour and other dry ingredients, including the spices. Set that bowl aside.
When the carrots have been sitting in the mixture for the required 10 minutes, add the orange juice, butter, walnuts and chocolate chips to that bowl. Now add the contents of that bowl into the bowl containing the flour and seasonings. Make sure that you mix gently. It is important that the mixture is not over mixed. Unlike yourself, the batter should not be smooth.
Add the combined mixture to the individual muffin tins. Let the muffins cook for 15 to 20 minutes, or if you think they are done insert a toothpick into the center of one. If the toothpick comes out clean, the muffins are completed. Let the muffins cool for five minutes, then remove from the tin.
One thing that you may want to do is make a loud noise about five minutes before the muffins are done so that your girl wakes up and walks into the kitchen just as the muffins are cooling. Have a selection of juice and expensive coffee ready for her. And also have cream.
Smoove out.
More recipes:
Lobster For Two
Quail For Two
Corn For Two

Smoove's kind of politics :

Oh! And it's *finally* happened... another of my fantastic ideas has been burgled, stolen out from under me. I've said many a time over the past few months that my beloved iPhone has identified and met my every need: to satisfy my curiosity (Google), find my way (Mapquest), chat with friends (via Facebook), even to get a little jiggy with the husband via texting, wheeeee!
But there's been one leetle tiny thing that's missing.
Enter the iPhone vibrating massager app:

Gee... I wonder what THAT's for???

I really don't think I'm ready to take my relationship with my phone to that next level, but since it was free, I downloaded it anyway;-)

But I'm totally not getting this: well, not today anyhow...

Happy, Happy Day!/Middle Eastern Lentil Soup

Couple things:
First, not only was I able to confabulate far enough in advance to plan and coordinate a trip for the kids today that was super awesome (and actually WORKED OUT; how often does THAT happen?!?), but was able to find a decent recipe for my favorite Middle Eastern soup:

PUREED LENTIL SOUP - SHAWRBAT `ADAS MAJROOSHA
(Serves from 8 to 10)

1 Tablespoon olive oil
2 large onions, chopped
1 small hot pepper, finely chopped (I used red pepper flakes)
8 cups water (I used 4 cups chicken broth, 4 cups water and a little bouillon)
1 cup split lentils, rinsed (I totally cheated and used yellow split peas, which was plenty tasty...)

2 teaspoons salt
1 teaspoon cumin (I toasted 1/2 tsp cumin seed and added it as well)
1 teaspoon ground coriander seeds
1/2 teaspoon pepper
Pinch of saffron
2 Tablespoons white rice, uncooked (skipped this, might add a couple carrots next time..)
1/4 cup lemon juice

Heat oil in a saucepan and sauté onions and hot pepper over medium heat for 10 minutes. Add remaining ingredients, except lemon juice, and bring to boil. Cover and cook over medium heat for 25 minutes. Puree; then return to saucepan and reheat. Stir in lemon juice; then serve.

MMmmmmmmm! Shahrazad-a-licious!



Oh, and most importantly:

After enough collective moments of pontification and random bits of insight, I was FINALLY able to make some progress regarding the teenage angst that I've had such a hard time identifying and resolving all summer, and it's about freaking time...

To wit; I've recently joined Facebook, which over the past few days has brought to the forefront ever so painfully how bad I have been over the years at establishing and maintaining relationships with *anybody* thru the course of my lifetime. Whereas the few people I've "friended" have set up their pages and have gone about getting scads of people here and there to become their "friends" (it's an evolutionary process you can see unfolding as people you're friends with make other friends and then can see the friends of their friends and add them once they determine that they sat next to them in the third grade, etc and etc), I've pretty much reached my saturation point pretty early in the game. To make matters worse, I've spent quite a bit of time now wracking my brain trying to remember the names of people I've known over the years, and to be honest-- either I have no recollection whatsoever of their identifying characteristics such that I can find them, or it's highly unlikely they will remember me any better than I remember them, gar! And in addition-- and perhaps worst of all-- as I've been peeking into the pages of those I'm closely related to, I've come to realize that I had NO IDEA how little I know about them, their lives, their families, and how little they know of mine (and then vacillating on wishing that MORE of my family had Facebook pages so I could peek into their lives as well).



I've said in one of my few lucid moments of self awareness over the years that one of the strangest aspects of my life is that there are very few witnesses to who I've been-- very infrequent visits to the homeland, contacts with childhood friends, old boyfriends, school teachers, etc. All the ghosts of my past are far far away, and are rarely-- if ever-- revisited, barely remembered, and over time the memories have faded into nonexistence. New life experiences quickly took over the void that was to become my past, and then POOF! It was as if the first 18 years of my life never happened.



When you add the fact that I have the worst memory ever and barely remember the details of really *anything*, it's not hard to imagine how I was able to develop over the years the ability to keep reinventing myself-- new jobs, locales, people I've interacted with in a superficial and temporary way for years and years, none of whom I've really kept in touch with as I kept mindlessly putting one foot in front of the other. Logistically, I have turned my back on as many as 10 different lifetimes, each full of coworkers, neighbors, jobs, life experiences... never to return. And it's not as if I had set out to do it intentionally-- it's just what I'm good at, what comes naturally to me.



So with the recent advent of my school reunion (sorry to beat THAT horse for the 80 millionth time but it's what got this ball rolling in the FIRST place...), and now this existential Facebook crisis, I've come to realize that I've spent the past 20 years drifting through life in a constant state of new people and new things, day after day after day, while never looking back, expecting to settle down, make friends, put down roots, or touch anything in an meaningful way. I get too close; I get nervous, I keep moving. Life is messy, and I prefer not to get involved... and now it's becoming a pattern: I avoid doing the same things over and over, going the same places, because I don't want to be recognized, be accountable. And strangely, without my even knowing it, what was once a novelty has evolved into a pathology... and so it goes.

And all these many years it's worked for me, never been a problem-- until things like reunions and social networking sites force you to pause and look back on your life, take an inventory, and make you realize that while the past 20 years may have offered you an interesting amalgam of life experiences and novelties to chat about wittily at a cocktail party, you don't have much of substance to show for it.



And that's IT! That's the angst that's been driving me to distraction for months now on end.

Yippie yahooey, hip hip hooray, I figured it out!... And while I'm glad to have THAT mess all sorted out into a tidy pile, the real work begins of how to fix it, start forming relationships with people that will "stick"....and I have no idea how to go about it.

Zip.

Nada.

Zero.

But what is it that they say? A fault recognized is half corrected??



All I can do is hope that the same Facebook mojo that helped me discover the origin of my internal conflict will also assist me in finding a resolution, that magically after all these years I will overcome my distrust of all things human and finally settle down;-)

It can happen...

Pizza (and Madonna)!

Now I'd be the first to admit that I am no fan of Madonna-- never liked her tinny, babygirl voice, her persona... not even waaaay back in the 80's when I was young and impressionabe (as opposed to now, when I'm old and impressionable, no?). But I like this remix, the melody is haunting:
(there's no video, so just go about your business as you listen)



Pizza for dinner!
Used a Martha Stewart recipe for the crust, +/- a few variations:

Mix together and allow to sit until yeast proofs:
1 1/2 cups warm water
2 tb sugar
1 1/2 tb dry yeast

and then add 1/4 cup olive oil (I used the stored oil from the chicken confit and tossed in 4 of the garlic cloves baked in the confit, making this quite possibly the best pizza I've ever eaten...my mouth is happy happy happy)

Pour into Kitchenaid mixing bowl fitted with bread dough attachment and add 2 cups whole wheat flour and 2 cups unbleached flour. Knead on medium for 2 minutes, adding flour if needed until dough pulls away from sides of bowl.
Preheat oven to 200 degrees and turn oven off. Cover mixing bowl with plastic wrap and place in warm oven on a potholder for an hour to rise. Then have at it!
**It's a sticky dough, so you'll need to use a good amount of flour on your work surface and rolling pin, and use cornmeal on your baking pan**

Using the dough, I made a pepperoni (bake at 450 until done to your satisfaction) and an artichoke goat cheese pizza , day-um! They were both fabulous:-)

More Food Blogging/French Food

My 11 year old is becoming a Francophile-- strangely and unfathomably enamored of all things French, especially those things he can put in his mouth.

More specifically, he has developed a fascination with confit, a type of meat that is slow poached in it's own fat (yes, you read that correctly). Kid's been bugging me to make it for weeks... I bought a duck for this very purpose ($9.99/lb!), but found a cheater recipe using chicken leg quarters and olive oil, so mr ducky can stay in the freezer for a while longer while we contemplate his fate.

Never one to follow a recipe, I had to be the knob who has no idea what she's doing and mess with hundreds of years of French cuisine. So instead of just putting the chicken in the olive oil as instructed, I covered it with a thin layer of hen of the woods mushrooms and baked the whole mess for two hours at 300 degrees. Once it was done I made this for dinner, tossing in some of the wild mushroom confit, chopped, in addition to sauteeing some fresh portabellas as instructed. Pretty tasty, I must say. The sauce was lacking a little something in the way of moisture... maybe I need to toss the pasta with a little olive oil, add more pasta water, I dunno. But the dish had a depth of rich flavor that I've never experienced before, and was well worth the effort and/or yuck factor of eating oil poached food.

I am also on a mission to make a tarte tatin sometime this week and an apple cake for Emily's birthday. I also have to make a key lime pie for a co worker who is due to have her baby this week and a strawberry rhubarb apple pie for a party on Saturday.. egads! It's like Christmas baking all over again!
I loves me some tasty pie!

More of My Favorite (Forgotten) Recipes/Teriyaki Chicken Pita, Chicken Kick

Chancery Teriyaki Chicken Pita
4 chicken breast halves (about 5 ounces each), cut in bite-size pieces
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup pea pods, stems removed
1 cup broccoli buds
1/2 cup red bell pepper strips
1 cup cut yellow squash, sliced in half-moon shapes
1 cup cut carrots, cut in very thin julienne strips
1/2 cup teriyaki glaze (see recipe)
8 slices jack cheese (1 ounce each)
4 pieces Greek pita bread
4 large lettuce leaves
4 pickle spears
In large oven-proof skillet, saute chicken pieces in oil. When chicken is almost cooked through, add vegetables and cook an additional 1 to 2 minutes. Vegetables should be bright and firm to the bite. Do not overcook. Add teriyaki glaze to coat vegetables and chicken. Shingle cheese over chicken and vegetables and set under broiler. Broil until cheese is melted, 1 to 2 minutes. Microwave pita bread 10 seconds. Pour vegetable-cheese mixture over pita bread. Fold pita over and secure with decorative pick. Set on large leaf of lettuce and garnish with pickle spear. Serve with french fries, 5-bean salad or pasta salad.
Makes 4 servings.
Teriyaki glaze:
1/2 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup plus
2 tablespoons sugar
Pinch of minced fresh ginger
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1 1/2 teaspoons dry sherry
1 1/2 tablespoons pineapple juice
2 tablespoons water
1 1/2 tablespoons cornstarch
1 1/2 teaspoons sesame oil
1 1/2 teaspoon sesame seeds
In small, heavy-bottomed saucepan, combine soy sauce, sugar, ginger, garlic powder, pepper, sherry and juice. Bring to simmer. Combine water and cornstarch; whisk together. Add to simmering liquid to thicken; continue to simmer 10 minutes. Put small, heavy-bottomed saute pan over medium heat. Add oil and seeds. Toast seeds until lightly browned. Immediately pour seed mixture into thickened teriyaki glaze to stop seeds from overtoasting; mix to combine. Use 1/2 cup with chicken/vegetable mixture. Reserve remaining glaze for another use.
Makes about 2/3 cup.

Chancery Restaurant Chicken Kick
Spicy tomato relish (see recipe)
Alfredo sauce (see recipe)
1 1/2 pounds skinless, boneless chicken breasts, cubed
1/4 cup vegetable oil
6 ounces julienne-cut red bell pepper (1 large)
8 ounces cooked andouille sausage (or precooked spicy Polishsausage), sliced on the bias
11 ounces dry penne pasta, cooked
1 tablespoon Poultry Magic (Cajun seasoning blend forblackening)

Prepare spicy tomato relish.
Prepare alfredo sauce and keep warm.
Saute chicken in oil in large, deep skillet. When half done, add red peppers and sausage. Cook over medium heat until chicken is cooked through.
Add Alfredo sauce, cooked pasta and poultry seasoning. Cook, tossing regularly, until mixture comes to a boil, then pour into serving bowl. Garnish with tomato relish.
Makes 4 to 6 servings.
Spicy tomato relish:
1 to 2 fresh jalapeno peppers, seeded and finely diced (or to taste)
1 tablespoon chopped fresh cilantro leaves
1/4 cup finely diced onion
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon Lawry's seasoning salt
1/4 teaspoon black pepper
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 cup diced fresh plum tomatoes cut into 1/4-inch pieces
Juice from half a lime
Combine all ingredients in bowl. Mix well.
Alfredo sauce:
1 1/2 teaspoons garlic powder
3 tablespoons chicken base
3 cups whipping cream
3/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese
2 1/2 teaspoons cornstarch
3 tablespoons water
Place garlic powder and chicken base in saucepan. Add cream and heat, stirring occasionally. When hot,add Parmesan, stirring regularly until cheese melts. Add cornstarch that has been dissolved in water andcontinue to cook until sauce thickens enough to coat back of spoon. Remove from heat and keep warm.

Christmas Sweets/Date Nut Balls, Roulade Cake:

Date Nut Balls (can be made ahead and stored)
Makes about 6 to 7 dozen

1 cup (2 sticks) butter
1 ½ cups sugar
2 cups finely chopped dates
2 tablespoons milk
1 teaspoon salt
2 eggs, well beaten
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup chopped nuts
4 cups crispy rice cereal
Sweetened shredded coconut (about 3 cups)

In medium pan, melt butter and sugar. Add dates and cook until mixture boils. Remove from heat. Whisk eggs into milk and stir into hot mixture with salt. Return to heat and boil 2 minutes. Remove from heat, add vanilla and nuts (tester used pecans). Cool completely, then stir in cereal, mixing until well coated. Shape into 1-inch balls, then roll in coconut.

What I'll be making for St Nick dessert:
Bittersweet Chocolate Roulade (from Cooks Illustrated): (make day before)

6 oz bittersweet (semisweet) chocolate, chopped fine
2 tb cold unsalted butter, cut into 2 pieces
2 tb cold water
1/4cup dutch process cocoa, sifted, plus extra for unmolding
1/4 cup unbleached, all purpose flour, plus more for baking sheet
1/8 tsp salt
6 large eggs, separated
1/3 cup sugar
1 tsp vanilla
1/8 tsp cream of tartar

Adjust rack to middle position and heat oven to 400 degrees. Spray 12 by 17.5 inch rimmed baking sheet with nonstick cooking spray, cover bottom with parchment paper, and spray parchment with nonstick spray; dust surface with flour and tap out excess.

Bring 2 inches of water to simmer in small saucepan over medium heat. Combine chocolate, butter, and water in small heatproof bowl and cover tightly with plastic wrap. Set bowl over pan, reduce heat to medium low, and heat until bitter is almost completely melted and chocolate pieces are glossy, have lost definition, and are fully melted around edges, about 15 minutes. Do not stir or let water boil under chocolate. Remove bowl from pan, unwrap, and stir until smooth and glossy. While chocolate is melting, sift 1/4 cup cocoa, flour, and sat together into small bowl and set aside.

In bowl of standing mixer fitted with whisk attachment, beat yolks at medium high speed until just combined, about 15 seconds. With mixer running, add half of sugar. Continue to beat, scraping down sides of bowl as necessary until yolks are pale yellow and mixture falls in thick ribbon when whisk is lifted, about 8 minutes. Add vanilla and beat to combine, scraping bowl once, bout 30 seconds. Turn mixture into medium bowl; wash mixer bowl and whisk attachment and dry.

In clean bowl with clean whisk attachment, beat whites and cream of tartar at medium speed until foamy, about 30 seconds. With mixer running, add about 1 tsp sugar; continue beating until soft peaks form, about 40 seconds. Gradually add remaining sugar and beat until whites are supple and glossy and hold stiff peaks when whisk is lifted, about 1 minute longer. Do not over beat. While whites are beating, stir chocolate mixture into yolks. With rubber spatula, stir 1/4 of whites into chocolate mixture to lighten it; fold in remaining whites until almost no streaks remain. Sprinkle dry ingredients over top and fold in quickly but gently

Pour batter into prepared pan; using an offset icing spatula and working quickly, even surface and smooth batter into corners of pan. Bake until center of cake springs back when touched with a finger, 8-10 minutes, rotating pan halfway through baking. Cool in pan on wire rack for 5 minutes.

While the cake is cooling, lay clean kitchen towel over work surface and sift remaining tablespoon cocoa powder over towel; with hands, rub cocoa towel. Run paring knife around perimeter of baking sheet to loosen cake. Invert cake onto towel and peel off parchment.

Roll cake, towel and all, into jelly roll shape. Cool for 15 minutes, then unroll cake and towel. Using offset spatula, immediately spread filling over surface of cake, almost to edges. Roll up cake snugly. Set large sheet pf parchment paper on overturned rimmed baking sheet and set cake seam side down on top. Trim both edges on diagonal; spread ganache over roulade with small icing spatula. Use fork to make wood grain striations on surface of ganache before it sets. Refrigerate baking sheet with cake to set icing, about 20 minutes.

Filling:
1/2 cup heavy cream
2 tsp finely ground espresso beans
6 tb confectioner's sugar
16.5 oz mascarpone (or cream) cheese

Bring cream to simmer i small pan over high heat. Off heat, stir in espresso and powdered sugar; cool slightly.
Beat mascarpone cheese and cooled cream until fluffy. Refrigerate until ready to use.

Dark Chocolate Ganache:
3/4 cup heavy cream
2 tb unsalted butter
6 oz chopped bittersweet chocolate
1 tb cognac (optional)

Microwave cream and butter in measuring cup in high until bubbling, about 90 seconds. Place chocolate in heatproof bowl (or bowl of food processor fitted with steel blade). Pour hot cream mix over chocolate and sit of a minute, then mix until well incorporated (or pour hot cream thru feed tube and process about 3 minutes). Cool at room temp about an hour until spreadable.

Holiday Food that Rocks/Praline Sweet potatoes, Maple Phyllo Dessert Cups, Wild Turkey Soup, Baked Brie:

Tried and true holiday food that will make your eyes roll heavenward in fits of ecstasy, but your booty more -licious than you might prefer:

Praline Sweet Potatoes
6 cups baked, mashed sweet potatoes (I mash 'em in the mixer, lazy girl style!)
1/2 cup maple syrup
2 tablespoons vanilla extract
1 tb pumpkin pie spice (or equivalent)
1 tb grated ginger (we likes the ginger!)
4 eggs
1 cup heavy cream

1 stick butter
1 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/4 cups chopped pecans

DIRECTIONS
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C).
In a mixing bowl, combine the sweet potatoes, syrup, vanilla extract, spices, eggs and cream. Whip until light and fluffy, and spread evenly in buttered casserole dish.
Prepare the topping by combining the butter, brown sugar, flour and pecans (I used the food processor and pulsed until crumbly). Sprinkle over sweet potato mixture.
Bake for at least an hour in the preheated oven, maybe longer, until casserole is puffy in the middle and pecans are toasted.
Eat until the point of sickness like a little piggy.

Maple Phyllo Dessert Cups
two, 8 oz packages of cream cheese, softened
1/4 cup (real) maple syrup (preferrably from your own maple trees, he he. Martha ain't got nothing on this girl!)
1/2 cup brown sugar
1 tsp maple extract
1/2 cup heavy whipping cream

40+ phyllo prebaked phyllo shells

1/4 cup maple syrup
1/2 cup pecans, toasted and finely chopped

DIRECTIONS:
Blend first four ingredients together until well mixed. With balloon whip attachment, slowly drizzle in 1/2 cup of heavy whipping cream until fluffy (3-5 minutes or so). Place mix into pastry bag fitted with star tip, and pipe into phyllo shells. Chill at least 3 hours. Drizzle each cup with remaining 1/4 cup maple syrup (1/4 tsp or so for each) and top with the pecans shortly before serving (any leftover mix is pretty fan-freaking-tastic on plain bagels the next day, mmmmm~).

Someone made a Baked Brie with Orange Cranberry Sauce for our work party yesterday, it was AMAZING. I'll try to weasel the recipe somehow and post it when I can:
(Updated ACTUAL recipe follows... I was close:)

1/2 package Puff Pastry Sheets
1 egg
1 tablespoon water
1/2 cup +/- cooled cranberry sauce (recipe follows)
1 (13.2 ounce) round Brie cheese, rind intact

DIRECTIONS
Thaw pastry sheet at room temperature 30 minutes. Preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Mix egg and water.
Unfold pastry sheet on lightly floured surface. Roll into 14 inch square. Cut off corners to make a circle. Spread preserves to within 1 inch of pastry edge. Sprinkle cranberries and almonds over preserves. Top with cheese. Brush edge of circle with egg mixture. Fold two opposite sides over cheese. Trim remaining two sides to 2 inch from edge of cheese. Fold these two sides onto the round. Press edges to seal. Place seam-side down on baking sheet. Decorate top with pastry scraps if desired. Brush with egg mixture.
Bake 20 minutes or until golden. Let stand 30 minutes to allow cheese to set. Serve with crackers, or a fork, whatev. I was craving this the whole dang week after I had it.

Cranberry Sauce (modified from Cooks Illustrated)
3/4 cup orange juice (or water)
1 cup brown sugar
1/4 tsp salt
1 Tb grated orange zest

1 bag fresh or thawed frozen cranberries (12 ounces)

In a medium saucepan, combine first 4 ingredients; bring to a simmer over medium heat, stirring constantly, until sugar dissolves.
Add cranberries and continue simmering until cranberries pop and mixture has thickened; about 5 minutes.
Off heat, stir in 2 tb orange liqueur (Grand Marnier or Triple Sec)

After Thanksgiving Soup:
(best when prepared with Jake's wild turkey, but he didn't get one this year, bummer)
Place turkey carcass (as much of it as you can fit) into a large crock pot. Cover with water and a splash of apple cider vinegar (leaving room at top to boil), and heat on high until mix starts to boil. Turn on low, and forget about it for a while (or overnight).
Strain the broth, picking out all the decent meat off the bones, and save for the soup.
*The vinegar removes a lot of minerals from the bones, making the broth super rich and the bones really soft. I feed the softest, mushiest ones to the dogs for treats.
Cool the broth until the fat is solid and can be removed with a spoon; put fat aside in a bowl.
In large dutch oven/soup kettle, sautee in 1/2 cup of the reserved fat (or butter) until tender but crisp:
1 medium onion, chopped
2 stalks celery, sliced
2 carrots, sliced (+/-, we like a lot of carrots)
2 cups sliced mushrooms (the hen of the woods we find across the street are always nice, but you can use white or baby portabellas, whatever you can forage at the grocery store, lol!)

Reduce heat, and sprinkle in 1/2 cup flour, stirring until bubbly and well mixed. Add broth slowly, stirring constantly. Bring to a boil, and add:
2 cups cooked wild rice
2 cups half and half (or heavy cream, or even whole milk if you prefer. It's all good.)
2 cups cooked, diced turkey
Parsley, pepper, garlic powder, dill, and chicken base to taste
Simmer for 30 minutes.

Jacob wanted me to add this one:

Jacob's "Da Bomb" (don't ask) Peppermint Fudge:
2 bags (11 oz) Ande's Candies chips
2 bags (12 oz) chocolate chips (your choice: milk, chocolate, semisweet, whatever you fancy)
2 14 oz cans sweetened condensed milk
dash salt
1 tsp peppermint extract

Heat the above in a large, heavy pan (we used our largest dutch oven), stirring constantly until melted and well incorporated. Pour into a 9x13 inch pan lined with wax paper. Crush as many peppermint candies as you feel like (up to a cup), and press into top of soft fudge. Cool slightly, and cut into 1 inch squares. Chill.

Quitter/Apple Pie in a Bag:

Cyndi's Totally Copied from the Elegant Farmer Apple Pie in a Bag Recipe (made with our very own apples, how cool is that?)

Whenever you get around to it, preheat oven to 375.

Filling:
10 apples, peeled, cored, and thickly sliced
1/2 cup sugar
2 tablespoons cornstarch
1 tablespoon lemon juice

1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract (+/- to taste)
1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon (+/-)
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg (+/-)

Pour into deep dish unbaked pie crust (I just buy them. Who the hey can make good pie pastry anymore?? I sure can't...)

Topping:

Pulse in food processor until crumbly and pile on top of apples evenly:

1 cup butter

1 cup flour

1 cup sugar

Slide pie into a brown paper bag that's placed on it's side. Fold up the opening a couple times and staple, and nip and tuck the back part of the bag and staple so it doesn't touch any part of the oven once it's placed inside.

Bake on a large baking sheet for one hour; cut large circle in the top part of the bag so the crust is exposed, and bake for another 20-30 minutes until the crust is toasty to your liking.

Cool for a while, and serve with vanilla bean ice cream.

MmmmmmMMmmmmmmm! Another totally wonderful and evil cheat-worthy dessert, damn!

Why o why am I baking, might you ask, when I am still trying to diet and be a good girl??

Because I've had a rough week and I'm soothing my poor, battered soul (ok, that sounds pretty dramatic, n'est pas? but it really did suck):

My vision is still a little wonky; have received tons of conflicting information about whether or not the haloes will improve. Don't think I'll be able to drive ever again at night if it doesn't get better, and am already the big fat scaredy baby when it comes to night driving (driving in general, really, so it makes me sad to face a lifetime of sitting my ass home night after night if I ever DO get a life...) I can read better now, so that's a plus...

But I still spent THREE completely awful hours last night working on a research article, to only come up with TWO LAME PARAGRAPHS. I was soooo relieved to even get that done, but once I compared it with those the other students wrote, I knew in my heart of hearts that I just don't have what it takes to work on my degree right now. And after talking with a coworker, I was no longer convinced that I wanted to be a nursing instructor, anyway. I like to teach, but am honestly not the finest representative of my profession (never having kept the same job for more than 2 years, never worked Med Surg or ICU, the meat and potatoes of our craft, and what I'd likely get stuck "teaching").

Consequently....... after being a total witch (no pun intended) to the kids as they were getting ready for Trick or Treating (the day I was furiously trying to write my last round of last minute, half assed papers) and working SO HARD last night, it dawned on me that I just needed to quit/call it a day/throw in the towel/whatevvvaaaahhhhhhhh.

And so today, I did.

Ahhhhhhhhh! Wonderful relief, to have my life back; to cook dinner, make a pie, eat with my family... go the gym, hang out with friends, clean my house, even BLOG-- free from guilt that I should be doing something else.

Yay!

I still have to pay 300 some $$ since I didn't quit a couple days earlier (story of my life...), but it's PRICELESS to have my life back, with a fresh perspective on how nice it is to just be me:

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! And damn proud of it, too!

Bleah!/Pumpkin Pie Custard

Lazy Sunday, not much going on... amazing how much and how little you can get done in the span of a day when you're slogging thru, barely paying attention.
Didn't make it to the groovy outing this weekend, which bums me out a little; but I don't know exactly how I would handle more evidence that I am wasting the best of my years worshiping at the feet of the Blockbuster movie club, or more acknowledgement that some people's worlds are interesting and large, and mine... well, mine is not.

Ah, PMS! I feel your sweet embrace!

Perhaps THAT could be why I am insatiable lately, didn't even consider it until I pulled out my appointment book (phone) and mapped it out-- damn! When I worked at a women's health clinic years ago, I was always amazed at how 14 year old girls knew with amazing accuracy when their "friends" would arrive... me, I'm pushing 40 and still have no clue.
Could be why everything is making me crazy, including this stupid keyboard in which the space button, for cripes sake, isn't working correctly. Considering that this is where the children play their games/do my space, etc, there is likely enuff food under the keys to feed a hungry toddler... it's a wonder it works at all and I should be grateful, instead of wanting to throw the whole thing under a moving train-- gar! Soo getting tired of having to go back and put all the spaces in between the words, wahhhhhhh!

Interesting weekend, to be sure. Grace's counselor suggested that we try and do something with the girl, something she wanted to do, in an effort to spend time with her/get to know her/etc. Never you mind that every time we try to talk to her, she tells us to either "shut up" or "go away", and tells us "I don't know" when we ask her what she would like to do.... so in the absence of the slightest idea, we gleaned a little:
She was talking earlier in the day about some shop she and her friends had travelled to the day before, which had some items she really liked.
So off we went, in search of things to buy to demonstrate our parental interest and love.
So where did my daughter take us???
To a head shop in Racine, ick!, which reeked of patchouli, incense, and other such things I swore off years and years ago. I mean, really-- is this crap genetic? Girl knows very little about my past (she could care less, as surely it was lame and of no interest to a hipster like herself, lol!); about my travelling with the Grateful Dead (had to chuckle at the vast array of Jerry and GD merchandise... um, most of those geezers are long gone), and my opening a shop much like this one (only like 1000x nicer; no drug paraphernalia, nasty piercing stuff... it was all handmade artwork and imports from India, Guatemala, Bali, etc).
So I'm standing in this shop with my kid and I'm thinking: "I don't have any clue who this girl is anymore", this teenager who (unbeknownst to me) has been dilating the piercings in her ears (my appeal that she will have droopy gramma holes that will never heal fell on deaf earlobes; she pulled out her piercing and I almost fell over when I saw the gaping hole, so gross!), this girl who is standing on the precipice of being just a little too much like me as a young person-- only way younger, much more immature, and much too eager for all the trouble that surrounds her.
Me, I was so much more of a spectator: found things fascinating, yet was unwilling to commit to any one lifestyle and would move on to the next shiny and interesting thing as soon as I felt I had figured the old one out (I was also somewhat concerned about getting in TROUBLE: didn't want to really get too involved in anything that might be a problem later, you know, if I wanted to run for public office later in life, tee hee).
Daughter, however, loves it all, and it makes me a little nervous.
We ended an unsettling afternoon by stopping by the Old Country Buffet, where Grace used to love to go with her grandpa. Place is quite the melting pot, I'll tell ya: there was a 450# lady who was talking about her pregnant 14 year old and how she needed another trip to the dessert bar, if only her arthritic knees could carry her there; a booth of fine Hispanic men who looked like they wanted to eat my daughter for dessert (and my husband, the sweet talker said "they were even checking YOU out", as if a booth full of men who would screw any drunken thing they could immobilize for 45 seconds wouldn't be so desperate to oogle an old broad like myself-- hey! If you don't have enuff sex appeal to entice those sorts of guys, you might as well just sew it up and move in with the nuns next door).
Oh! And then there was the group of ladies who were with a baby shower who were standing next to me at the salad bar wearing nametags that said: "Baby Poop", and "Spitup", etc : mmmmmmmmm! That's a tasty visual, ho ho ho. Good thing the folks from NAACOG weren't meeting there, with humorous nametags that read:"Pap Smear", "Genital Warts", or "Herpetic Lesion", might have been a little yucky... but I suppose, now that I think about it, me and the ladies from work could get in on the fun: I could be "Irritable Bowel" (get it? PMS???), and someone could be "Colon Polyp", and another could be "Bowel Prep", wheeee! We could hang out by the gravies and gross people out into eating their mashed potatoes dry...

Anyhoo, told ya I was bitchy!

Fabulous PMS food (and low carb, for the most part..)

Heat in a pan for 10-15 minutes, stirring constantly with a spatula:
1 15 oz can pumpkin (I threw in a cooked sweet potato that we had left over from dinner the other day, too)
Bunch of ginger (1-2 tbs fresh or 1-2 tsp ground)
1/2 tsp cinnamon, to taste
1/2 tsp nutmeg, to taste
1/4 cup maple syrup
1/4 cup sugar free vanilla syrup

In a separate bowl, mix 1 cup milk with 4 eggs until well blended. Whisk in pumpkin mixture until smooth.
Bake at 325 degrees in a casserole dish that is immersed in a larger pan filled 1/2 full with water. Bake for 50-60 minutes until center almost set; prop over door open with a pot holder and allow to sit for 20-30 minutes until custard is set. Refrigerate overnight, and try not to eat the whole thing for breakfast... Jacob really liked this served with extra maple syrup, lucky little dude! Soooo glad we have a gallon left until we can make more next spring:-)

p.s. my bad knee is getting wonky, completely blue about that as well. WTF will I do if it blows out, and I can't participate in my acts of daily absolution?
Won't end up doing all 3 classes tomorrow in an effort to be cautions, just spin and swim. Pretty sure it was the stoopid scuplting class "walking with resistance bands wrapped around your feet" thingey that messed up my ligaments, boo. And I've been trying to be so careful! Anyway... I remember reading something somewhere (hazard of reading 6 things at once... minimal retention) about your joints and ligaments being more labile during your special girlie time, bah! Stupid hormones!

Best.Bread.Ever. (Strawberry Rhubarb Bread)

Makes one loaf (I doubled it and made TWO):

3/4 cup light brown sugar, packed
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1 egg
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1 tablespoon rum
1 cup flour
1/4 cup whole wheat flour (I used all wholegrain white, worked great)
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 cup sour cream (used yogurt)
1/2 cup diced rhubarb
1/2 cup sliced strawberries
1/4 cup chopped pecans

Topping:
1 tablespoons granulated sugar
1/4 teaspoon cinnamon
3 to 3 1/2 tablespoons flour
2 tablespoons butter, melted
1/4 cup chopped pecans or walnuts

Beat together the brown sugar, vegetable oil, egg, vanilla and rum. Combine the flours, salt and baking soda; stir. Add dry ingredients to first mixture with the sour cream. Stir in strawberries, rhubarb and pecans.
Spread into a greased 9×5-inch loaf pan — the batter will be very thick. Combine topping ingredients except the pecans, they should be thick and clumpy; add the pecans last and sprinkle over the loaf.
Bake at 350° for about 55 to 65 minutes, or until a wooden pick or cake tester inserted in center comes out clean.
Cool at least 10 minutes on rack before removing the bread from the pans.

End your season of strawberry picking with a slice of bread and a strawberry dacquiri, and you'll (almost) forget what a pain it was;-) Sadly, we only got about 7-8# of berries in the freezer (vs 15# from last year), but they were worth every mosquito bite! I'll just have to ration myself...

(My compliments to Smitten Kitchen for the recipe)

Garden Update/Macarons:

It was over 70 degrees this weekend, so the hubby and I felt motivated to ready the gardens over the past two days. We picked up sticks (we's got lots o sticks out here in the sticks-- 10 + loads full!), raked out and cleaned the perennial garden debris (5 loads full), tilled the kitchen gardens and the large garden patches.. I planted onions, garlic, shallots, beans, peas, spinach, and mesculin/spicy salad mix. I'm sore, sunburned, and feel 100% better, btw.
On a completely unrelated side note:
I made some macarons, and had very little difficulty (unless you count the dog eating a whole tray of them,.. damn!). The cookies turned out perfectly, and they were fabulous with a lightly almond/vanilla infused Italian buttercream (they were overstuffed since I had 1/3 less cookies to frost-- double stuffed macarons.....mmmmmmm). I'm going to try and make espresso macarons tonight, with a little bit of coconut flour in place of some of the almond (since I've conquered the mighty macaron, of course it's time to mess with the 200 year old recipe, wiseass that I am...) Husband says I need a new hobby vs making the most fussy recipes I can find, and I suspect he's right. I told him we needed a POOL, and that could be my new hobby vs the ass fattening one I currently have. I think he secretly wished my new hobby would include being a domestic goddess in other realms (cleaning the house daily, making gourmet dinners each and every night, martini and maribou slippers when he gets home from work each day...), but sorry dude, no such luck. I'll take a pool, and then the endless batches of cupcakes and French pastries will end. At least in the summer.

Espresso Macarons :
120 gr. egg whites, divided (this ends up being 4 egg whites total)
35 gr. sugar
150 gr. almond meal
150 gr. powdered sugar
2 tsp. espresso powder
For the syrup:150 gr. sugar and 50 gr. water

Prepare 3 sheet pans by lining them with parchment paper.Have a piping bag with a 1/2" round tip ready to go.
Sift together the almond meal, powdered sugar and espresso powder. Mix together with 60 grams of egg whites (2 egg whites) until well blended and set aside.
In a stand mixer, whip the remaining 60 grams of egg whites with the 35 grams of sugar to medium-soft peaks, turn the mixer to low speed to keep the whites moving while you prepare your sugar syrup.
-In a heavy bottomed sauce pan, bring the 150 grams of sugar and 50 grams of water to about 230f.
-Turn your mixer back up to medium speed and slowly pour in the hot syrup (carefully) not worrying about any that sticks to the sides of the bowl. Whip the egg white and syrup mixture until the whites are cooled and you have a very pretty shiny meringue.
-Gently fold the meringue into the almond mixture.-Pipe the mixture into 1" circles onto the prepared sheet pans leaving at least 1" of space between each.
Let the pans sit out for about half hour to an hour to allow a "skin" to form on top (basically when you touch your finger to the surface, no batter will come off).
-Preheat oven to 320f (I found 320f to be too hot for mine, they exploded at this temperature...but then my oven runs hot).
Bake the meringues, one sheet at a time (double sheet panned for insulation on the bottom) for about 15 minutes.
Remove from oven and allow to cool before filling.

Ganache filling:
6 1/2 ounces good quality semi-sweet or bittersweet chocolate, chopped into about 1/2 inch pieces
1/2 cup heavy cream
1 Tbsp corn syrup
1 Tbsp butter
-Heat cream, corn syrup and butter in a saucepan until it boils. Pour over the chocolate, making sure the chocolate is covered in the cream mixture. Let sit about 5 minutes and then whisk until the mixture is smooth and a pudding-like consistency.
-Pipe on bottoms of macarons, and top with another macaron.
-Let cookies sit until chocolate filling has set up.

Basic Macaron Recipe:

Ingredients
225 grams icing sugar
125 grams ground almonds
110 grams egg whites (about 4), aged overnight at room temperature
30 grams granulated sugar
Pinch of salt
Procedure
1. On three pieces of parchment, use a pencil to draw 1-inch (2.5 cm) circles about 2 inches apart. Flip each sheet over and place each sheet on a baking sheet. [Note: You only have to draw circles on the parchment paper if you want absolutely even-sized macarons. If you're skilled with piping and don't mind eyeballing the amount of batter per cookie, skip this step.]
2. Push almond flour through a tamis or sieve, and sift icing sugar. Mix the almonds and icing sugar in a bowl and set aside. If the mixture is not dry, spread on a baking sheet, and heat in oven at the lowest setting until dry. Sift almonds at least TWICE.
3. In a large clean, dry bowl whip egg whites with salt on medium speed until foamy. Increase the speed to high and gradually add granulated sugar. Continue to whip to stiff peaks—the whites should be firm and shiny.
4. With a flexible spatula, gently fold in icing sugar mixture into egg whites until completely incorporated. The mixture should be shiny and 'flow like magma.' When small peaks dissolve to a flat surface, stop mixing.
4. Fit a piping bag with a 3/8-inch (1 cm) round tip. Pipe the batter onto the baking sheets, in the previously drawn circles. Tap the underside of the baking sheet to remove air bubbles. Let dry at room temperature for 1 or 2 hours to allow skins to form.
5. Bake, in a 160C/325F oven for 10 to 11 minutes. Use a wooden spoon to keep the oven door slightly ajar, and rotate the baking sheet after 5 minutes for even baking.
6. Remove macarons from oven and transfer parchment to a cooling rack. When cool, slide a metal offset spatula or pairing knife underneath the macaron to remove from parchment.
7. Pair macarons of similar size, and pipe about 1/2 tsp of the filling onto one of the macarons. Sandwich macarons, and refrigerate to allow flavors to blend together. Bring back to room temperature before serving.

Italian Buttercream:

-2 egg whites (60 mL)
- 1/3 cup plus 1 tbsp granulated sugar
- 4 oz (½ cup) unsalted butter at room temperature, cut into slices
- 1 tsp vanilla
-1/2 tsp almond extract

In an electric mixer bowl, whisk together the egg whites and sugar. Set the bowl over a pot of simmering water and heat the mixture, whisking often, for 3 to 5 minutes, or until it feels warm and sugar has dissolved.Transfer the bowl to the electric mixer and whip warm egg mixture on high speed using the whisk attachment until stiff and shiny, 3 to 5 minutes. Add the butter, one slice at a time, and continue to mix until all the butter is thoroughly incorporated. Add any flavourings and refrigerate for 1 hour or until it becomes firm. The buttercream can be kept, covered and refrigerated for up to 1 week. (I just heated the sugar with 1 tb water until it registered 230 degrees on the candy thermometer, and poured the hot syrup into the eggs that were beaten until soft peaks with a dash o cream of tartar; whip about 5 minutes and add vanilla/almond and then the butter) If the frosting looks curdled, just keep whipping it until it becomes smooth, btw...

UPDATE:
I made the espresso macarons using the recipe above, and I had problems with it. Some of the cookies cracked, while others didn't, some developed "feet", others didn't, and for some reason, a whole pan refused to bake all the way and were still gooey inside, even after baking 5+ more minutes than the others... odd. It was pretty darn random, totally didn't make sense...
I had much better success with the basic recipe, not 100% sure why-- maybe it was the 2 tb of coconut I substituted for a little bit of almond meal, which I would NOT do again, I just couldn't get the coconut fine enough and it was a little mealy, even tho it was tasty. The coffee flavor was good, but I could easily have added more espresso powder.
I added a tb of espresso powder to the ganache, which turned out perfectly-- great recipe! I let it sit out at room temp for about an hour to get it to piping consistency, and it was excellent.
Overall, not a bad cookie, just not as "macaron" like as the basic one.
I pledged off baking until I could lose a wee bit o the winter weight I gained, but I slipped and made a quick batch today (didn't age the egg whites, only ground/sifted the almonds once-- hope they turn out!), I'm such an addict!

2 Variations on a Theme/Enchiladas:

I am *desperate* to get my account of our trip to Austin on the blog; here's to hoping that I get around to it before I FORGET some of the finer details.... (of course, I could always make stuff up, but I'm getting tired of that:-)

Anyhoodle:
I created two different enchilada-type recipes, having been inspired by our culinary journey to parts south into the land of waaaaay better food.
Here's the first, made last week (non-veggie version)
Chorizo and Buffalo stuffed poblanos (and enchiladas)
Mix 1 pound (raw) ground buffalo (or any other ground meat) in a mixing bowl with 1.5 tubes (raw) beef chorizo, 3/4 of a large onion (chopped), 1 tsp oregano, 1/2 tsp pan toasted cumin seed, the chopped tops of the poblanos (about 1/3 to 1/2 cup), 1/2 cup hominy (add after meat/veggies have been fairly well mixed so it doesn't get too squashed)
Stuff mix into 6 good sized poblanos that have had the tops removed and have been slit down the front. Place in a 9x13 inch pan (which has a wee bit o enchilada sauce, your recipe or prepared, in the bottom..), cover the peppers a bit with more enchilada sauce, and put a few random clumps of roasted veggie salsa on top (see recipe below). Cover with foil, and bake for 45 minutes at 375.
Serve, sprinkled with cheese and sauce from pan, with addl. veggie salsa.

There was a good amount of the meat mixture left, so I threw together a batch of enchiladas, using up the leftover enchilada sauce as well. I warmed 6 corn tortillas in the microwave (until soft), put some sauce in the baking pan, rolled each tortilla up with 1/8 cup (pan fried) meat mix and a sprinkle of cheese. I then warmed up the 6 remaining tortillas and filled up another small pan, covered them all up with enchilada sauce, sprinkled on some cheese, and then put them in the freezer. Now I can be a lazy-booty some other day when I have no motivation to cook (which has been far too often lately)!

Tonight's recipe (vegetarian):
cut one package of tempeh into 1 inch cubes and boil in water for 5 minutes, cool and chop. Saute 1/4 cup choppped onion, 1/2 cup chopped red bell pepper, 1/2 finely cubed zucchini, 1/4 cup finely chopped mushrooms and 1 clove chopped garlic in saute pan, about 5 mintes until softened. Add 1 tb (+/- to taste) chili powder, 1/2 tube vegetarian chorizo, 1/2 cup of the tempeh cooking water, 1/2 cup roasted veggie salsa (recip below), and 1/2 cup hominy. Heat until bubbly. Add 1/2 cup plain yogurt, stir to incorporate, and then add chopped tempeh.
Fill 8 whole wheat tortillas each with 1/2 cup filling, and place in a pan (again, put enchilada sauce on bottom). Top enchiladas with sauce and a sprinkling of cheese. Cover with foil and bake at 350-375 for 30 minutes, (if desired, remove foil and bake for an addl 5 minutes).

Tas-tee, and only the pickiest and stinkiest eaters will know that something is amiss with these enchiladas-- even my hubby complimented them (and nooooo, he didn't say they were "interesting"). Serve with a big ole veggie salad, topped with Newman's Own Lime Vinaigrette...

PAMELA JONES' ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE ROASTED VEGETABLE SALSA (ADAPTED) From "The Passionate Vegetarian" by Crescent Dragonwagon
MAKES ABOUT TWO CUPS


2 Roma or plum tomatoes, halved
4 tomatillos, husked and halved
1/2 small onion, chopped
4 cloves garlic, with skins on
1-2 serrano chili peppers, whole
1 ancho or poblano chili, whole
2 whole hot Hungarian wax pepper,
2 whole jalapeño chili,
1 tablespoon virgin olive oil
1-3 tablespoons cilantro, stemmed
1/4 teaspoon kosher or sea salt
1/4 teaspoon cumin seeds, toasted (optional)
Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Combine tomatoes, tomatillos, onion, garlic, chilies, and peppers in a container with a fitted cover. Toss with oil and spread on non-stick baking sheets (probably 2).


Bake at 400 until peppers are blistered (about 40 minutes).


When cool enough to handle, peel, stem and seed the peppers (use gloves to protect skin). Place peppers, tomatoes, tomatillos and onions in a food processor.


Squeeze garlic out of their skins and buzz until smooth. Add cilantro, salt, and cumin seed to taste. Keeps in the refrigerator for up to a week.

Yawn!

There just aren't enough hours in the day... I always start each day at an absolute zombie like crawl, and then speed up frenetically as the day progresses if my caffeine doses kick in as planned... and here I find myself at 10:26 pm involved in 6 projects with no end in sight.
Yawn!
I ended up having the entire week off, but somehow didn't manage to get a whole lot done until this afternoon, when I tried to squeeze in every last opportunity to get the weekday stuff done. Yet in spite of all the millions of things I really hoped to accomplish and the inevitable lethargy, I think I've done fairly well:
I got my laptop back last night after a crazy trip to Waukesha, and after giving up in a drunken fiasco finally managed to get it hooked up this morning to the the wireless network I set up a few weeks ago (I forgot to push the "wireless" button last night, and thus couldn't figure out why it wasn't connecting to the system. Der!)
Words cannot express how fantastically cool it is to have my laptop on the counter where I can look up recipes, etc, while I'm cooking.
Tonight, I found out at the last minute that I had to prepare a dish for a brunch tomorrow am, so I frantically started perusing the recipe sites. I located a really decadent looking bread pudding (my favorite!) and started pulling ingredients out, whipping it together while using the laptop as a reference... fabulous! And can I mention for a moment that I loooooove how my kitchen is so well stocked these days that I can look up almost ANY recipe and have each and every ingredient (even if you have to use really good hot dog buns for your bread pudding--oops!), from the coconut milk I used in my curried butternut squash to the 6 cups of heavy cream and 2 cups of pecans for my bread pudding (and almost a dozen eggs-- thanks girls!).
It's been an adventuresome week for cooking, in my week of idle unemployment. We made a pilgrimage to the Whole Paycheck on New Year's Eve, where I bought $250 of "almost nothing to show for it". At the spur of the moment I pulled together an impromptu menu of things I've wanted to make for a long time, staggering their presentation throughout the evening:

I started with pan seared garlic infused scallops, followed by curried butternut squash soup (please o please do NOT use more than 1/2 tsp red pepper flakes), and then ended the night's meal with a *perfect* medium rare rib roast, potatoes topped with mushrooms sauteed with a sherry reduction, and seasoned brussels sprouts. After we shot off some fireworks at midnight, I served up Ghiardelli fudge brownies with vanilla bean ice cream, and then waddled off to bed, fat and happy.
Since becoming a new subscriber to Cooks Illustrated, I have really become even more intrigued with the science of cooking and have been waiting to try out a few of their recipes.
To get started with the recipes I chose, I needed to pick up an enameled cast iron Dutch Oven (a la Le Creuset, a $250 pot I've fantasized about but never knew could be found SO MUCH cheaper). Since I was a little slow on the uptake, almost every dutch oven in 50 miles was already sold out, and after about a half dozen phone calls, daily visits to the Wal Mart website, and a pilgrimage to a store far, far away (thank you, Garmin! you make scary adventures for a wimpy girl like me possible...) I finally got my hands on the 6.5 qt Tramontina Dutch Oven they recommended. Whew!
I then eagerly whipped up their "Best French Onion Soup" and served it with the Swiss gruyere they recommended....

But... nobody liked the soup, and we had a ton left over:-(

Even though the soup wasn't a winner, Jacob and I were still able to marvel at the process of reduction, the development of the "fond", and how deglazing built up the body of the soup. I think Jacob was a little sad that our first genuine attempt at "French" cooking wasn't so tasty, but I'm pretty sure he's still holding fast to the notion that French food somehow is his favorite (and why? was it the Alton Brown Coq au Vin episode?).

Since the prep was a wee bit of a pain in the arse, and the ingredients somewhat costly, I strained out the mass of pulpy onions this morning, fed them to the worms, and froze the broth for future use as soup base.... maybe it'll enjoy a second life as a tasty beef barley soup.

I made their "French Chicken in a Pot" tonight, with (separately, in the 3.5 qt dutch oven I got) oven roasted new potatoes, carrots, sweet potato, and onions, roasted with the strained and de-fatted jus from the chicken. The chicken was *beyond fabulous*-- tender, juicy, and flavorful, and well worth the scary Wal Mart trip.
Many of the recipes in this month's issue seem to be pretty time intensive, so I resolved to get a jump on tomorrow's dinner of roast beef and no knead bread this afternoon so it would be all ready to go when I got home from my party. Oh! If I could always be this organized... makes staying home to be the family domestician seem somewhat less mind numbingly dull when my meals have an 18 to 24 hour prep time.
To be honest, I know that I'm just trying to keep myself entertained during these (hellish) cold months. Being off work doesn't help in these 8 degree days either, even tho it really *was* nice to get a break after the chaos of the holidays, surgery, camp, and root canals (and then another flippin holiday!-- couldn't they space these out a bit and give a girl a break?)...

On a completely unrelated note:
I had a job interview yesterday, which I'm sure may come as a shock to some of my readers (please don't get mired in the heavy sarcasm).
In painful retrospect, which keeps playing over and over again in my head since it ended, it seems soooooooo odd to me that a 10 year, decorated veteran of serial interviewing would commit such a slew of interview faux pas....
Tell me honestly:
Is it really so bad to tell a prospective employer that you take criticism well because you make so many mistakes at your current job?
Really? You think that's bad?

I've gotten sooo many jobs lately without interviewing, maybe I'm getting a little rusty...

I think the flubs happened because, in spite of the later shift hours and low pay (and farther location), I *reallyreally* want this job and thus had to jinx myself, adding more angst to an already angst riddled experience. I have job interview #2 next week for a job I completely *don't* want. I'm guessing it'll go off brilliantly, without a single foible or stupid slip o the tongue, making me look like the perfect candidate for the wrong job. Shit.
Completely irrational, I know. But if you're expecting anything in my life to make sense, you really haven't been paying attention.

An oldie but a goodie. And me in a nutshell (no pun intended...)

Praline Sweet Potatoes

Ask, and you shall receive (all things in life should be so gratifying!)

4 cups mashed sweet potatoes (if using a canned variety with syrup, make sure to drain them and use less sugar. I use fresh, bake them until squashy, and mash them in the mixer)
1/4 cup white sugar (+ or minus to taste)
2 tablespoons vanilla extract
1 tsp finely chopped ginger (or 1/2 tsp powdered)
1 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp cloves
1/4 tsp nutmeg(all spices to taste)
4 eggs, beaten
1 cup heavy cream (or the milk of your choice)
Topping:1/2 stick (real) butter, cold and cut into 1/2 inch slices
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup chopped pecans
DIRECTIONS
Butter one 2 quart casserole dish. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). In a mixing bowl, combine the sweet potatoes, sugar, vanilla extract, eggs and cream. Blend well, and spread evenly in casserole dish. Prepare the topping by using a pastry cutter or 2 knives to mix the butter, brown sugar and flour into a crumble. Mix in pecans, and sprinkle over sweet potato mixture. Bake for 30 minutes to an hour in the preheated oven (depending on the size of your dish-- mine was small and packed full, so it took longer).